t for any one leaving our Church; no preference of another
Church, no delight in its services, no hope of greater religious
advancement in it, no indignation, no disgust, at the persons and
things, among which we may find ourselves in the Church of England.
The simple question is, Can _I_ (it is personal, not whether another,
but can _I_) be saved in the English Church? am _I_ in safety, were I
to die tonight? Is it a mortal sin in _me_, not joining another
communion? P.S. I hardly see my way to concur in attendance, though
occasional, in the Roman Catholic chapel, unless a man has made up
his mind pretty well to join it eventually. Invocations are not
_required_ in the Church of Rome; somehow, I do not like using them
except under the sanction of the Church, and this makes me unwilling
to admit them in members of our Church."

4. "March 30. Now I will tell you more than any one knows except two
friends. My own convictions are as strong, as I suppose they can
become: only it is so difficult to know whether it is a call of
_reason_ or of conscience. I cannot make out, if I am impelled by
what seems clear, or by a sense of _duty_. You can understand how
painful this doubt is; so I have waited, hoping for light, and using
the words of the Psalmist, 'Show some token upon me.' But I suppose I
have no right to wait for ever for this. Then I am waiting, because
friends are most considerately bearing me in mind, and asking
guidance for me; and, I trust, I should attend to any new feelings
which came upon me, should that be the effect of their kindness. And
then this waiting subserves the purpose of preparing men's minds.
I dread shocking, unsettling people. Anyhow, I can't avoid giving
incalculable pain. So, if I had my will, I should like to wait till
the summer of 1846, which would be a full seven years from the time
that my convictions first began to fall on me. But I don't think I
shall last so long.

"My present intention is to give up my Fellowship in October, and to
publish some work or treatise between that and Christmas. I wish
people to know _why_ I am acting, as well as _what_ I am doing; it
takes off that vague and distressing surprise, 'What _can_ have made
him?'"

5. "June 1. What you tell me of yourself makes it plain that it is
your duty to remain quietly and patiently, till you see more clearly
where you are; else you are leaping in the dark."

In the early part of this year, if not before, there was an id