them; not of reviling,
not of slandering, not of hating, though political interests require
it; but the duty of loving brethren still more abundantly in spirit,
whose faces, for our sins and their sins, we are not allowed to see
in the flesh."

No one ought to indulge in insinuations; it certainly diminishes my
right to complain of slanders uttered against myself, when, as in
this passage, I had already spoken in condemnation of that class of
controversialists to which I myself now belong.

I have thus put together, as well as I could, what has to be said
about my general state of mind from the autumn of 1839 to the summer
of 1841; and, having done so, I go on to narrate how my new
misgivings affected my conduct, and my relations towards the Anglican
Church.

When I got back to Oxford in October, 1839, after the visits which I
had been paying, it so happened, there had been, in my absence,
occurrences of an awkward character, bringing me into collision both
with my Bishop and also with the University authorities; and this
drew my attention at once to the state of what would be considered
the Movement party there, and made me very anxious for the future. In
the spring of the year, as has been seen in the Article analysed
above, I had spoken of the excesses which were to be found among
persons commonly included in it; at that time I thought little of
such an evil, but the new thoughts, which had come on me during the
long vacation, on the one hand made me comprehend it, and on the
other took away my power of effectually meeting it. A firm and
powerful control was necessary to keep men straight; I never had a
strong wrist, but at the very time, when it was most needed, the
reins had broken in my hands. With an anxious presentiment on my mind
of the upshot of the whole inquiry, which it was almost impossible
for me to conceal from men who saw me day by day, who heard my
familiar conversation, who came perhaps for the express purpose of
pumping me, and having a categorical _yes_ or _no_ to their
questions--how could I expect to say anything about my actual,
positive, present belief, which would be sustaining or consoling to
such persons as were haunted already by doubts of their own? Nay, how
could I, with satisfaction to myself, analyse my own mind, and say
what I held and what I did not? or say with what limitations, shades
of difference, or degrees of belief, I held that body of opinions
which I had openly professe