headache and a bandage
round his throbbing brows. It developed that he had three times in rapid
succession referred to the city as Frisco, and on being warned against
this practice had inquired:

"Well, wot do you want me to call her--plain Fris?"

That was the last straw. The barkeeper took a bung-starter and felled
him as flat as a felled seam--and all present agreed that it served him
right.

An even worse breach of etiquette on the part of the outlander is to
intimate that an earthquake preceded the great fire. That is positively
the unforgivable sin! In any quarter of the city you could get many
subscriptions for a fund to buy something with silver handles on it for
any man who would insist upon talking of earthquakes. To make my meaning
clearer, I will state that there are only two objects of general use in
the civilized world that have silver handles on them, and one of them is
a loving cup; but this article would not be a loving cup. A native will
willingly concede that there was a fire, which burned its memories deep
into the consciousness of the city that recovered from it with such
splendid courage and such inconceivable rapidity; but by common consent
there was nothing else. It does not take the stranger long to get this
point of view, either.

If I were in charge of the publicity work of the San Francisco Fair I
should advertise two attractions that would surely appeal to all the
women in this country, and to most of the men. In my press work I would
dwell at length upon the fact that in this part of California a woman
may wear any weight and any style of clothes--spring clothes, summer
clothes, fall clothes or winter clothes--and not only be perfectly
comfortable while so doing, but be in the fashion besides; and to be in
the fashion is a thing calculated to make a woman comfortable whether
she otherwise is or not.

To see a group of four women promenading a San Francisco street on a
pleasant morning is to be reminded of that ballet representing the Four
Seasons, which we used to see in the second act of every well-regulated
extravaganza. The woman nearest the walls has on her furs--it is always
cool in the shade; the one next to her is wearing the very latest
wrinkles in spring garniture; the third one, let us say, is dressed in
the especially becoming frock she bought last October; and the one on
the outside, where the sun shines the brightest, is as summery in her
white ducks and her white slipper