RNOSE replied, that it was proposed to begin with seven
divisions of police of a score each, lettered from A to G inclusive. It
was proposed that not more than half this number should be placed on
active duty, and that the remainder should be kept on shelves in the
police office ready to be called out at a moment's notice.

'THE PRESIDENT, awarding the utmost merit to the ingenious gentleman who
had originated the idea, doubted whether the automaton police would quite
answer the purpose. He feared that noblemen and gentlemen would perhaps
require the excitement of thrashing living subjects.

'MR. COPPERNOSE submitted, that as the usual odds in such cases were ten
noblemen or gentlemen to one policeman or cab-driver, it could make very
little difference in point of excitement whether the policeman or
cab-driver were a man or a block. The great advantage would be, that a
policeman's limbs might be all knocked off, and yet he would be in a
condition to do duty next day. He might even give his evidence next
morning with his head in his hand, and give it equally well.

'PROFESSOR MUFF.--Will you allow me to ask you, sir, of what materials it
is intended that the magistrates' heads shall be composed?

'MR. COPPERNOSE.--The magistrates will have wooden heads of course, and
they will be made of the toughest and thickest materials that can
possibly be obtained.

'PROFESSOR MUFF.--I am quite satisfied. This is a great invention.

'PROFESSOR NOGO.--I see but one objection to it. It appears to me that
the magistrates ought to talk.

'MR. COPPERNOSE no sooner heard this suggestion than he touched a small
spring in each of the two models of magistrates which were placed upon
the table; one of the figures immediately began to exclaim with great
volubility that he was sorry to see gentlemen in such a situation, and
the other to express a fear that the policeman was intoxicated.

'The section, as with one accord, declared with a shout of applause that
the invention was complete; and the President, much excited, retired with
Mr. Coppernose to lay it before the council. On his return,

'MR. TICKLE displayed his newly-invented spectacles, which enabled the
wearer to discern, in very bright colours, objects at a great distance,
and rendered him wholly blind to those immediately before him. It was,
he said, a most valuable and useful invention, based strictly upon the
principle of the human eye.

'THE PRESIDENT required som