zart--(_seeing Melesinda_.)--Melesinda!

SEVERAL LADIES AT ONCE
Nay positively, Melesinda, you shan't engross him all to yourself.

(_While the Ladies are pressing about MR. H. the Gentlemen shew signs of
displeasure_.)

FIRST GENTLEMAN
We shan't be able to edge in a word, now this coxcomb is come.

SECOND GENTLEMAN
Damn him, I will affront him.

FIRST GENTLEMAN
Sir, with your leave, I have a word to say to one of these ladies.

SECOND GENTLEMAN
If we could be heard----

(_The ladies pay no attention but to_ MR. H.)

MR. H.
You see, gentlemen, how the matter stands. (_Hums an air_.) I am not my
own master: positively I exist and breathe but to be agreeable to
these----Did you speak?

FIRST GENTLEMAN
And affects absence of mind, Puppy!

MR. H.
Who spoke of absence of mind, did you, Madam? How do you do, Lady
Wearwell--how do? I did not see your ladyship before--what was I about
to say--O--absence of mind. I am the most unhappy dog in that way,
sometimes spurt out the strangest things--the most mal-a-propos--without
meaning to give the least offence, upon my honour--sheer absence of
mind--things I would have given the world not to have said.

FIRST GENTLEMAN
Do you hear the coxcomb?

FIRST LADY
Great wits, they say----

SECOND LADY
Your fine geniuses are most given----

THIRD LADY
Men of bright parts are commonly too vivacious----

MR. H.
But you shall hear. I was to dine the other day at a great nabob's, that
must be nameless, who, between ourselves, is strongly suspected
of--being very rich, that's all. John, my valet, who knows my foible,
cautioned me, while he was dressing me, as he usually does where he
thinks there's a danger of my committing a _lapsus_, to take care in my
conversation how I made any allusion direct or indirect to presents
--you understand me? I set out double charged with my fellow's
consideration and my own, and, to do myself justice, behaved with
tolerable circumspection for the first half hour or so--till at last a
gentleman in company, who was indulging a free vein of raillery at the
expense of the ladies, stumbled upon that expression of the poet, which
calls them "fair defects."

FIRST LADY
It is Pope, I believe, who says it.

MR. H.
No, Madam; Milton. Where was I? O, "fair defects." This gave occasion to
a critic in company, to deliver his opinion on the phrase--that led to
an enumeration of all the various words which might have been used
instead of "defect