what time the train
goes, or what platform it starts from, or what towns it stops at, and
what churches or other buildings of interest are to be seen in those
towns, there are porters and guards and Bradshaws and guidebooks to
tell you, and it's they whom you are expected to consult, not any
fellow-traveler who happens to be at hand. If you ask him, you break the
rules. Had my friend said: "I am an American. Would you mind telling
me what those buildings are?" all would have gone well. The Englishman
would have recognized (not fifty years ago, but certainly to-day) that
it wasn't a question of rules between them, and would have at once
explained--either that he didn't know, or that the buildings were such
and such.

Do not, I beg, suppose for a moment that I am holding up the English
way as better than our own--or worse. I am not making comparisons; I am
trying to show differences. Very likely there are many points wherein
we think the English might do well to borrow from us; and it is quite as
likely that the English think we might here and there take a leaf from
their book to our advantage. But I am not theorizing, I am not seeking
to show that we manage life better or that they manage life better; the
only moral that I seek to draw from these anecdotes is, that we should
each understand and hence make allowance for the other fellow's way. You
will admit, I am sure, be you American or English, that everybody has
a right to his own way? The proverb "When in Rome you must do as Rome
does" covers it, and would save trouble if we always obeyed it. The
people who forget it most are they that go to Rome for the first
time; and I shall give you both English and American examples of this
presently. It is good to ascertain before you go to Rome, if you can,
what Rome does do.

Have you never been mistaken for a waiter, or something of that sort?
Perhaps you will have heard the anecdote about one of our ambassadors
to England. All ambassadors, save ours, wear on formal occasions a
distinguishing uniform, just as our army and navy officers do; it
is convenient, practical, and saves trouble. But we have declared it
menial, or despotic, or un-American, or something equally silly, and
hence our ambassadors must wear evening dress resembling closely the
attire of those who are handing the supper or answering the door-bell.
An Englishman saw Mr. Choate at some diplomatic function, standing about
in this evening costume, and said: