head of no man who was
not utterly destitute of common sense.

[Footnote 54: The author of the "History of the Popes." He had been a
professor in the University of Macerata, and a Counsellor of the
Inquisition. He became a Protestant, and died in England.--ED.]

You tell me, that your intention at present is, to take orders in the
Church of England; and you hope I will approve of your plan: but I must
tell you honestly, that this is a most ridiculous hair-brained conceit.
Before you can be qualified for the smallest living, you must study nine
years at Oxford; you must eat at a moderate computation, threescore of
fat beeves, and upwards of two hundred sheep; you must consume a
thousand stone of bread, and swallow ninety hogsheads of porter. You
flatter yourself with being highly promoted, because you are an Earl's
brother, and a man of genius. But, my dear friend, I beg it of you to
consider, how little these advantages have already availed you. The
army was as good a scene for you to rise in as the church can be; and
yet you are only a lieutenant in a very young regiment.

I seriously think, that your most rational scheme should be, to turn
inn-keeper upon some of the great roads: you might have an elegant sign
painted of Apollo and the Muses, and entertainment for men and horses,
by THE HONOURABLE ANDREW ERSKINE, would be something very unusual, and
could not fail to bring numbers of people to your house. You would by
this means have a life of most pleasing indolence, and would never want
a variety of company, as you would constantly dine and sup with your
guests. Men of fashion would be glad to receive you as their equal; and
men of no fashion would be proud to sit at table with one who had any
pretension to nobility. I hope the honest concern which I shew for your
real welfare, will convince you how much I am,

My dear Sir,

Your most affectionate friend,

JAMES BOSWELL.

* * * * *

LETTER XXXVI.

Kelly, July 5, 1762.

Dear BOSWELL,--Vanity has, in all former ages, been reckoned the
characteristic of poets; in our time, I think they are more particularly
distinguished by modesty; I have carefully perused their works, and I
have never once found them throwing out either thought, sentiment, or
reflection of their own; convincing proof of their humility; they seem
all to allow that the ancients, and some few of the earlier moderns,
were much better writers than themselves; t