better than I do."

"Before we enter on business, Colonel, allow me to inquire if you
feel relieved of that bilious attack you complained of the day before
yesterday? I'm of a bilious habit myself, and know something about the
management of digestion!"

"A good digestion is an excellent thing, Carson; as for me, I drank too
much claret with my friend B----y; and there's the secret. I don't like
cold wines, they never agree with me."

"Nor do I; they are not constitutional. Your father was celebrated
for his wines, Colonel: I remember an anecdote told me by Captain
Ferguson--by the by, do you know where Ferguson could be found, now,
sir?"

"Not I. What wines do you drink, Carson?"

"A couple of glasses of sherry, sir, at dinner; and about ten o'clock, a
glass of brandy and water."

"Carson, you are sober and prudent. Well about these cursed petitions;
you must help me to dispose of them. Why, a man would think by the tenor
of them, that these tenants of mine are ground to dust by a tyrant."

"Ah! Colonel, you know little about these fellows. They would make black
white. Go and take a ride, sir, return about four o'clock, and I will
have everything as it ought to be."

"I wish to heaven, Carson, I had your talents for business. Do you think
my tenants attached to me?"

"Attached! sir, they are ready to cut your throat or mine, on the first
convenient opportunity. You could not conceive their knavishness and
dishonesty, except you happened to be an agent for a few years.

"So I have been told, and I am resolved to remove every dishonest tenant
from my estate. Is there not a man, for instance, called Brady? He has
sent me a long-winded petition here. What do you think of him?"

"Show me the petition, Colonel."

"I cannot lay my hand on it just now; but you shall see it. In the mean
time, what's your opinion of the fellow?"

"Brady! Why, I know the man particularly well. He is one of my
favorites. What the deuce could the fellow petition about, though? I
promised the other day to renew his lease for him."

"Oh, then, if he be a favorite of yours, his petition may go to the
devil, I suppose? Is the man honest?"

"Remarkably so; and has paid his rents very punctually. He is one of our
safest tenants."

"Do you know a man called Cullen?"

"The most litigious scoundrel on the estate."

"Indeed? Oh, then, we must look into the merits of his petition, as
he is not honest. Had he been honest like Brady, Carso