u[151] that declarest unto man what
is his heart. Without thee, O sovereign Goodness, I could not know how
ill my heart were. Thou hast declared unto me, in thy word, that for all
this deluge of evil that hath surrounded all hearts, yet thou soughtest
and foundest a man after thine own heart;[152] that thou couldst and
wouldst give thy people pastors according to thine own heart;[153] and I
can gather out of thy word so good testimony of the hearts of men as to
find single hearts, docile and apprehensive hearts; hearts that can,
hearts that have learned; wise hearts in one place, and in another in a
great degree wise, perfect hearts; straight hearts, no perverseness
without; and clean hearts, no foulness within: such hearts I can find in
thy word; and if my heart were such a heart, I would give thee my heart.
But I find stony hearts too,[154] and I have made mine such: I have
found hearts that are snares;[155] and I have conversed with such;
hearts that burn like ovens;[156] and the fuel of lust, and envy, and
ambition, hath inflamed mine; hearts in which their masters trust, and
_he that trusteth in his own heart is a fool_;[157] his confidence in
his own moral constancy and civil fortitude will betray him, when thou
shalt cast a spiritual damp, a heaviness and dejection of spirit upon
him. I have found these hearts, and a worse than these, a heart into the
which the devil himself is entered, Judas's heart.[158] The first kind
of heart, alas, my God, I have not; the last are not hearts to be given
to thee. What shall I do? Without that present I cannot be thy son, and
I have it not. To those of the first kind thou givest joyfulness of
heart,[159] and I have not that; to those of the other kind thou givest
faintness of heart;[160] and blessed be thou, O God, for that
forbearance, I have not that yet. There is then a middle kind of hearts,
not so perfect as to be given but that the very giving mends them; not
so desperate as not to be accepted but that the very accepting dignifies
them. This is a melting heart,[161] and a troubled heart, and a wounded
heart, and a broken heart, and a contrite heart; and by the powerful
working of thy piercing Spirit such a heart I have. Thy Samuel spake
unto all the house of thy Israel, and said, _If you return to the Lord
with all your hearts, prepare your hearts unto the Lord_.[162] If my
heart be prepared, it is a returning heart. And if thou see it upon the
way, thou wilt carry it home