demn me to what punishment He thought fit; and that it was my part
to submit to bear His indignation, because I had sinned against Him.
I then reflected that God, who was not only righteous, but omnipotent,
as He had thought fit thus to punish and afflict me, so He was able to
deliver me; that if He did not think fit to do it, 't was my
unquestioned duty to resign myself absolutely and entirely to His
will; and, on the other hand, it was my duty also to hope in Him, pray
to Him, and quietly to attend the dictates and directions of His daily
providence.
These thoughts took me up many hours, days, nay, I may say, weeks and
months; and one particular effect of my cogitations on this occasion I
cannot omit, viz., one morning early, lying in my bed, and filled with
thought about my danger from the appearance of savages, I found it
discomposed me very much; upon which those words of the Scripture came
into my thoughts, "Call upon Me in the day of trouble, and I will
deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify Me."
Upon this, rising cheerfully out of my bed, my heart was not only
comforted, but I was guided and encouraged to pray earnestly to God
for deliverance. When I had done praying, I took up my Bible, and
opening it to read, the first words that presented to me were, "Wait
on the Lord, and be of good cheer, and He shall strengthen thy heart;
wait, I say, on the Lord." It is impossible to express the comfort
this gave me. In answer, I thankfully laid down the book, and was no
more sad, at least, not on that occasion.
In the middle of these cogitations, apprehensions, and reflections, it
came into my thought one day that all this might be a mere chimera of
my own; and that this foot might be the print of my own foot, when I
came on shore from my boat. This cheered me up a little too, and I
began to persuade myself it was all a delusion, that it was nothing
else but my own foot; and why might not I come that way from the boat,
as well as I was going that way to the boat? Again, I considered also
that I could by no means tell, for certain, where I had trod, and
where I had not; and that if, at last, this was only the print of my
own foot, I had played the part of those fools who strive to make
stories of spectres and apparitions, and then are frighted at them
more than anybody.
Now I began to take courage, and to peep abroad again, for I had not
stirred out of my castle for three days and nights, so that I began to
starv
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