wrote to the same effect to M. de Courteil and the Duc de Choiseul,
telling them that I was to receive no brokerage; but that I should all
the same accept a proposal which I thought a profitable one, and saying
that I had no doubt of obtaining my expenses from the French Government.

As it was a time of rejoicing with us, M. d'O---- thought it would be a
good plan to give a ball. All the most distinguished people in Amsterdam
were invited to it. The ball and supper were of the most splendid
description, and Esther, who was a blaze of diamonds, danced all the
quadrilles with me, and charmed every beholder by her grace and beauty.

I spent all my time with Esther, and every day we grew more and more in
love, and more unhappy, for we were tormented by abstinence, which
irritated while it increased our desires.

Esther was an affectionate mistress, but discreet rather by training than
disposition the favours she accorded me were of the most insignificant
description. She was lavish of nothing but her kisses, but kisses are
rather irritating than soothing. I used to be nearly wild with love. She
told me, like other virtuous women, that if she agreed to make me happy
she was sure I would not marry her, and that as soon as I made her my
wife she would be mine and mine only. She did not think I was married,
for I had given her too many assurances to the contrary, but she thought
I had a strong attachment to someone in Paris. I confessed that she was
right, and said that I was going there to put an end to it that I might
be bound to her alone. Alas! I lied when I said so, for Esther was
inseparable from her father, a man of forty, and I could not make up my
mind to pass the remainder of my days in Holland.

Ten or twelve days after sending the ultimatum, I received a letter from
M. de Boulogne informing me that M. d'Afri had all necessary instructions
for effecting the exchange of the twenty millions, and another letter
from the ambassador was to the same effect. He warned me to take care
that everything was right, as he should not part with the securities
before receiving 18,200,000 francs in current money.

The sad time of parting at last drew near, amid many regrets and tears
from all of us. Esther gave me the two thousand pounds I had won so
easily, and her father at my request gave me bills of exchange to the
amount of a hundred thousand florins, with a note of two hundred thousand
florins authorizing me to draw upon him