"

"Divert myself," said I; "and where am I to find the means?"

"Be that care on my shoulders," said Francis Ardry. "Listen to me--my
uncles have been so delighted with the favourable accounts which they
have lately received from T--- of my progress in oratory, that, in the
warmth of their hearts, they made me a present yesterday of two hundred
pounds. This is more money than I want, at least for the present; do me
the favour to take half of it as a loan--hear me," said he, observing
that I was about to interrupt him; "I have a plan in my head--one of the
prettiest in the world. The sister of my charmer is just arrived from
France; she cannot speak a word of English; and, as Annette and myself
are much engaged in our own matters, we cannot pay her the attention
which we should wish, and which she deserves, for she is a truly
fascinating creature, although somewhat differing from my charmer, having
blue eyes and flaxen hair; whilst Annette, on the contrary . . . But I
hope you will shortly see Annette. Now, my plan is this--Take the money,
dress yourself fashionably, and conduct Annette's sister to Bagnigge
Wells."

"And what should we do at Bagnigge Wells?"

"Do!" said Francis Ardry. "Dance!"

"But," said I, "I scarcely know anything of dancing."

"Then here's an excellent opportunity of improving yourself. Like most
Frenchwomen, she dances divinely; however, if you object to Bagnigge
Wells and dancing, go to Brighton, and remain there a month or two, at
the end of which time you can return with your mind refreshed and
invigorated, and materials, perhaps, for a tale or novel."

"I never heard a more foolish plan," said I, "or one less likely to
terminate profitably or satisfactorily. I thank you, however, for your
offer, which is, I dare say, well meant. If I am to escape from my cares
and troubles, and find my mind refreshed and invigorated, I must adopt
other means than conducting a French demoiselle to Brighton or Bagnigge
Wells, defraying the expense by borrowing from a friend."

Footnotes:

{0a} Pronounced _Lav'en-gro_, not _Lav-en'gro_, the two first syllables
exactly like those of _lavender_. Borrow meant it to stand for "word-
master, philologist," but--_nomen omen_--already in Grellmann (1787)
_latcho lavengro_ stood for "a liar."

{1a} On 5th July 1803, at East Dereham, Norfolk, 17 miles west-north-
west of Norwich.

{1b} Captain Thomas Borrow (1758-1824), the youngest of a fa