ly from shame. He had not the heart to own it was Crump, and he
did not care that the Captain should know more of his destined bride.

"You wish to keep the five thousand to yourself--eh, you rogue?"
responded the Captain, with a good-humoured air, although exceedingly
mortified; for, to say the truth, he had put himself to the trouble
of telling the above long story of the dinner, and of promising to
introduce Eglantine to the lords, solely that he might elicit from that
gentleman's good-humour some further particulars regarding the young
lady with the billiard-ball eyes. It was for the very same reason, too,
that he had made the attempt at reconciliation with Mr. Mossrose which
had just so signally failed. Nor would the reader, did he know Mr. W.
better, at all require to have the above explanation; but as yet we are
only at the first chapter of his history, and who is to know what the
hero's motives can be unless we take the trouble to explain?

Well, the little dignified answer of the worthy dealer in bergamot,
"NEVER MIND HER NAME, CAPTAIN!" threw the gallant Captain quite aback;
and though he sat for a quarter of an hour longer, and was exceedingly
kind; and though he threw out some skilful hints, yet the perfumer was
quite unconquerable; or, rather, he was too frightened to tell: the
poor fat timid easy good-natured gentleman was always the prey of
rogues,--panting and floundering in one rascal's snare or another's. He
had the dissimulation, too, which timid men have; and felt the presence
of a victimiser as a hare does of a greyhound. Now he would be quite
still, now he would double, and now he would run, and then came the end.
He knew, by his sure instinct of fear, that the Captain had, in asking
these questions, a scheme against him, and so he was cautious, and
trembled, and doubted. And oh! how he thanked his stars when Lady
Grogmore's chariot drove up, with the Misses Grogmore, who wanted their
hair dressed, and were going to a breakfast at three o'clock!

"I'll look in again, Tiny," said the Captain, on hearing the summons.

"DO, Captain," said the other: "THANK YOU;" and went into the lady's
studio with a heavy heart.

"Get out of the way, you infernal villain!" roared the Captain, with
many oaths, to Lady Grogmore's large footman, with ruby-coloured tights,
who was standing inhaling the ten thousand perfumes of the shop; and the
latter, moving away in great terror, the gallant agent passed out, quite