deak-meat!'" Wonder whether this
is a typical sample of BOSCH's _badinage_. "What did he say to that,
BOSCH?" "Oh, he vas vair moch loff, a-course!" says BOSCH, with the
natural complacency of a successful humorist.

[Illustration: "Some story of a scandalous but infinitely humorous
nature."]

We go into the Old Prison, and see some horrible implements of
torture, which seem to exhilarate BOSCH. "Lokeer!" he says, "Dis vas a
pinition" (BOSCH for "punishment") "mit a can. Dey lie de man down and
vasten his foots, and efery dime he was shdrook mit de can, he jomp op
and hit his vorehaid.... Hier dey lie down de beoples on de back, and
pull dis shdring queeck, and all dese tings go roundt, and preak deir
bones. Ven de pinition vas feenish you vas det." He shows where the
Water-torture was practised. "Nottice 'ow de vater vas vork a 'ole in
de tile," he chuckles. "I tink de tile vas vary hardt det, eh?" Then
he points out a pole with a spiked prong. "Tief-catcher--put'em in
de tief's nack--and ged 'im!" Before a grim-looking cauldron he halts
appreciatively. "You know vat dat vas for?" he says. "Dat vas for de
blode-foots; put 'em in dere, yass, and light de vire onderneat."
No idea what "_blode-foots_" may be, but from the relish in BOSCH's
tone, evidently something very unpleasant, so don't press him for
explanations. We go upstairs, and see some dark and very mouldy
dungeons, which BOSCH is most anxious that I should enter. Make him go
in _first_, for the surroundings seem to have excited his sense of the
humorous to such a degree, that he might be unable to resist locking
me in, and leaving me, if I gave him a chance.

Outside at last, thank goodness! The Groote Kerk, according to BOSCH,
"is not vort de see," so we don't see it. _Sandford_ has a sneaking
impression that I ought to go in, but _Merton_ glad to be let off.
We go to see the pictures at the Mauritshuis instead. BOSCH exchanges
greetings with the attendants in Dutch. "Got _another_ of 'em
in tow, you see--and collar-work, _I_ can tell you!" would be a
free translation, I suspect, of his remarks. Must say that, in a
Picture-gallery, BOSCH is a superfluous luxury. He _does_ take my
ignorance just a trifle too much for granted. He _might_ give me
credit for knowing the story of ADAM and EVE, at all events! "De
Sairpan gif EVA de opple, an' EVA she gif him to ADAM," BOSCH
carefully informs me, before a "_Paradise_," by RUBENS and BRUEGHEL.
This rouses my _Mer