FREE BOOKS

Author's List




PREV.   NEXT  
|<   85   86   87   88   89   90   91   92   93   94   95   96   97   98   99   100   101   102   103   104   105   106   107   108   109  
110   111   112   113   114   115   116   117   118   119   120   121   122   123   124   125   126   127   128   129   130   131   132   133   134   >>   >|  
be better than putting it in the stove yourself," she observed, going back with an air of placidity to her sewing, "because then you'll know it's bad and if you burn it up now, you won't. You haven't even heard it." "I heard it before I wrote it," he argued. "I hear it again when I read it. That's a silly argument. Of course I know it." "You said a little while ago that you'd never heard any of your music until Mrs. Wollaston sang those songs. They sounded better than you thought they would." "That's different," he protested. "I knew they were good, damned good. Only I didn't quite realize how good they were. I suppose I won't realize until I hear her sing this how rotten it is. But I don't need to. I know well enough right now." He went on turning the pages back and forth with gloomy violence, reading a passage here and another there and failing to get the faintest ray of comfort out of any of it, even out of the old soiled quires which belonged obviously to the original score. "Is it all bad?" she asked. "Or just the new part." "The whole thing," he grunted. "That's that Belgian thing, isn't it?" "That's the one." "Well," she pointed out to him, "you thought that was good once. If it all looks alike to you this morning, perhaps what you've just been writing is as good as that, and it's just your mood to-day that makes it look rotten." He closed the score and slapped his hand down upon it with a gesture of dismissal. Then he rose and leaned back against the edge of the table. "That's good logic, my dear," he conceded, "but it doesn't cover the ground. The old stuff was good in a way. I really meant it and felt it and I managed to get it down on paper. And the new stuff is like it, in that it's a damned clever imitation of it. I had to do it that way because I couldn't get back into the old mood. I'm sick of atrocities and horrors--everything that's got the name of war in it, even though I was never under fire myself. Well, writing the imitation has made me hate the thing I was trying to imitate. I stuck at it for the reason I told you this morning. But, good God, when it results in stuff like this...! Jennie, what shall I do about it? Shall I take this thing now and chuck it into the stove and then tell La Chaise and Mrs. Wollaston to go to the devil? Or shall I tuck it under my arm like a good little boy and see if I can get away with it?" She looked at him thoughtfully. "What is the new thin
PREV.   NEXT  
|<   85   86   87   88   89   90   91   92   93   94   95   96   97   98   99   100   101   102   103   104   105   106   107   108   109  
110   111   112   113   114   115   116   117   118   119   120   121   122   123   124   125   126   127   128   129   130   131   132   133   134   >>   >|  



Top keywords:

Wollaston

 
realize
 

imitation

 

rotten

 

damned

 

thought

 
morning
 
writing
 

slapped

 
closed

managed

 

gesture

 

dismissal

 

conceded

 

ground

 

leaned

 

Chaise

 

results

 
Jennie
 

looked


thoughtfully

 

horrors

 

atrocities

 

couldn

 
imitate
 

reason

 
clever
 

sounded

 

suppose

 
protested

argument

 

placidity

 

sewing

 

observed

 

putting

 

argued

 
grunted
 

Belgian

 

belonged

 

original


pointed

 

quires

 

gloomy

 

violence

 
turning
 
reading
 

passage

 

comfort

 
soiled
 

faintest