oes not offer to pay half of it.
"Will send you another package in one of our extra lotteries for
nothing!"

Observe how particularly every knave is to tell his fool to "give us the
name of the nearest bank," so that the draft for the prize-money can be
forwarded instantly.

And in return for all this kindness, what do Messrs. Boult and-so-forth
want? Why, almost nothing. "The ridiculously small sum," as Mr. Montague
Tigg observed to Mr. Pecksniff, of $10. You observe that Hammett & Co.,
in one circular, demand $20, for the same $5,000 prize. But the amount,
they would say, is too trifling to be so particular about!

I will suggest a form for answering these gentlemen. Let every one of
my readers who receives one of their circulars just copy and date and
sign, and send them the following:

"GENTLEMEN:--I thank you for your great kindness in wishing to make
me the possessor of a $5,000 prize in your truly rich and splendid
Royal Havana Lottery. I fully believe that you know, as you say,
all about how to get these prizes, and that you can make it a big
thing. But I cannot think of taking all that money from such kind
of people as you. I must insist upon your having half of it, and I
will not hear of any refusal, I therefore hereby authorize you to
invest for me the trifle of $10, which you mention; and when the
prize is drawn, to put half of it, and $10 over, right into your
own benevolent pantaloons-pocket, and to remit the other half to
me, addressed as follows: (Here give the name of the "nearest
bank.")

"I have not the least fear that you will cheat me out of my half;
and, as you see, I thus place myself confidently in your hands.
With many thanks for your great and undeserved kindness, I remain
your obliged and obedient servant. ETC., ETC."

My readers will observe that this mode of replying affords full swing to
the expansive charities of Boult and his brethren, and is a sure method
of saving the expenditure of $10, although Boult is to get that amount
back when the prize is drawn.

I charge nothing for these suggestions; but will not be so discourteous
as to refuse a moderate percentage on all amounts received in pursuance
of them from Brother Boult & Co.

Here is the second special lot of letters I spoke of. I lay them out on
my desk as before: There are six letters signed respectively by Kimball,
Goodrich, Darlington, Kenne