was all very well for 'im to talk, but the chaps said 'e might drink
hisself to death for all they cared. And instead of seeing 'im safe
'ome as they used to when 'e was worse than usual he 'ad to look arter
hisself and get 'ome as best he could.

"It was through that at last 'e came to offer five pounds reward to
anybody as could 'elp 'im to become a teetotaler. He went off 'ome one
night as usual, and arter stopping a few seconds in the parlour to pull
hisself together, crept quietly upstairs for fear of waking 'is wife. He
saw by the crack under the door that she'd left a candle burning, so he
pulled hisself together agin and then turned the 'andle and went in and
began to try an' take off 'is coat.

"He 'appened to give a 'alf-look towards the bed as 'e did so, and then
'e started back and rubbed 'is eyes and told 'imself he'd be better in a
minute. Then 'e looked agin, for 'is wife was nowhere to be seen, and in
the bed all fast and sound asleep and snoring their 'ardest was little
Dick Weed the tailor and Mrs. Weed and the baby.

"Job Brown rubbed 'is eyes again, and then 'e drew hisself up to 'is
full height, and putting one 'and on the chest o' drawers to steady
hisself stood there staring at 'em and getting madder and madder every
second. Then 'e gave a nasty cough, and Dick and Mrs. Weed an' the baby
all woke up and stared at 'im as though they could 'ardly believe their
eyesight.

"'Wot do you want?' ses Dick Weed, starting up.

"'Get up,' ses Job, 'ardly able to speak. I'm surprised at you. Get up
out o' my bed direckly.'

"'Your bed?' screams little Dick; 'you're the worse for licker, Job
Brown. Can't you see you've come into the wrong house?'

"'Eh?' ses Job, staring. 'Wrong 'ouse? Well, where's mine, then?'

"'Next door but one, same as it always was,' ses Dick. 'Will you go?'

"'A' right,' ses Job, staring. 'Well, goo'-night, Dick. Goo'-night, Mrs.
Weed. Goo'-night, baby.'

"'Good-night,' ses Mrs. Weed from under the bedclothes.

"'Goo'-night, baby,' ses Job, again.

"'It can't talk yet,' ses Dick. 'Will you go?

"'Can't talk--why not?' ses Job.

"Dick didn't answer 'im.

"'Well, goo'-night, Dick,' he ses agin.

"'Good-night,' ses Dick from between 'is teeth.

"'Goo'-night, Mrs. Weed,' ses Job.

"Mrs. Weed forced herself to say 'good-night' agin.

"'Goo'-night, baby,' ses Job.

"'Look 'ere,' ses Dick, raving, 'are you goin' to stay 'ere all night,
Job Brown?'

"Job didn't answe