el that way about it. Probably when some member of his
family has got to go through an operation, he wipes away his tears with
one hand and makes a book on the result with the other. He probably
offers his friends even money that the party won't come out of the
ether, one to two that the party wouldn't rally from the shock, and one
to three against complete recovery inside of a month, or he will make a
combination offer whereby his friends can play the operation across the
board as a two or three proposition, Mawruss."

"And his friends, being also prize-fight fans, will probably take him
up," Morris suggested.

"Certainly they will," Abe concluded, "because to a prize-fight fan
suffering is not a sight which is to be avoided. It is something which a
typical prize-fight fan would take a special train and pay a hundred
dollars any time to see."

XXIV

FEEDING THE PEACE CONFERENCERS AND THE HOUSEHOLD

"Anybody which don't arrange beforehand what the price is going to be,
Mawruss, is never overcharged, no matter how much he gets soaked in the
bill," Abe Potash said to his partner, Morris Perlmutter, a few days
after the Hotel Crillon filed its claim against the American peace
mission for two million francs, "which, if the way the United States
government arranged with the management of the Hotel Crillon for the
board and lodging of them Peace Conferencers is any criterium, Mawruss,
we would got to start a recruiting drive for fifty thousand certified
public accountants for service abroad, with a chance to see the
wonderful scenery and bookkeeping of France."

"I thought the United States government didn't make any arrangement with
the Hotel Crillon before them Peace Conferencers went over, Abe," Morris
said.

"That's what I mean, Mawruss," Abe said, "which, when President Wilson
made up his mind to send all them experts over to France he sent for
Ambassador Sharp and asked him where's a good place for them Indians to
stay, and Sharp told him the Hotel Crillon, and when Mr. Wilson asked
him is it a good medium-price place, Mr. Sharp says he shouldn't worry,
that Jake Crillon is a good feller and wouldn't overcharge nobody,
y'understand, and for to leave it to Jake, and so Mr. Wilson done so,
Mawruss, and naturally this is the result."

"Why, what for a bill did the management of the Hotel Crillon put in
against the United States government, Abe?" Morris asked.

"They 'ain't put in any bill as yet, Mawruss