story of a woodsawyer who had worked for him and who
had the habit of accompanying the movement of his saw with talking to
himself. He asked him one day why he did so. "Why," said he, "for two
reasons. The first is, that it is a great pleasure to hear a sensible
man talk, and the second is that it is a great pleasure to talk to a
sensible man." [Laughter.]

Now, sir, I have but one warning to give you. It is said of Mercutio,
the wittiest creation of Shakespeare, who is despatched very early in
the play, "My sore wound hath served its turn, although it were not as
deep as a well nor as wide as a church door." It is said that if
Shakespeare hadn't killed Mercutio early, Mercutio would have killed
him. If you [turning to the President] are to preside year after year or
to attempt it upon so high and brilliant and bold a key as you have
assumed here to-night, if you don't kill the Alumni dinners, the Alumni
dinners will kill you. [Great laughter.] Yale College, as represented by
its graduates, is not self-conceited nor obtrusive. It is true they have
always felt the magnificent compliment paid to the College by that
greatest of English thinkers and philosophers Lord Bacon, who said in a
famous passage, as you will recall: "Eating makes a full man, drinking a
ready man, but to be an Alumnus of Yale, a wise man." Yet we are modest
and even reverent toward the claims of other universities. We are
satisfied at the humble position which the French bishop took towards
that great berry, the strawberry. "Doubtless," said he, "God Almighty
might have made a better berry than the strawberry, but doubtless He has
not." [Laughter.] That is our opinion of Yale College. [Applause.]

Now, to be an Alumnus of Yale College, is the object of all those who
enter the college and the object after getting there is to get out.
Sometimes indeed, the four years are spent without that fortunate
result. I remember to have heard of the son of a somewhat conspicuous
gentleman who had desired to give his children the benefit of an
education such as Yale affords, who had spent four years there; but the
entire four years were spent as a member of the Freshman class.
[Laughter.] What a fortunate condition to be continually towering over
more and more of those who are competing with him in scholarship and for
distinction! I know of none greater unless some mode might be
discovered by which one could be a Senior for four years. There is
nothing in human af