e of the
river, and a farmer ran out and seized the rope. While we were talking
to him I was just telling him that, as the gas was running out of the
neck of the balloon, maybe he'd better put out his cigar, when all of
a sudden there was a terrific bang. The gas exploded and wrapped us in
a sheet of flame, and the next minute some of the neighbors picked up
me and Jones. Jones was roasted nearly to a crisp. Exciting, wasn't
it?

"And they took him over to the farmhouse, where we found that they had
fished out Conly and were bringing him to. When he revived, they sent
the invalid corps back to town in a wagon, Jones groaning all the way
and I arguing with him to show that science requires her votaries to
give up a little of their personal comfort for the benefit it does the
human race, and Conly saying he wished he was well enough to go out
and bang the inventor of balloons with a gun.

"As soon as we got back to Easton a constable arrested me for chucking
that ignorant opponent of scientific inquiry up against the fence
and wrecking him. When I was let off on bail, I began to build a new
balloon. She's nearly done now, and I'm going to make an ascension
early next month in search of the ozone belt. Won't you go up with me?
The day is going to come when everybody will travel that way. It's the
most exhilarating motion in the world. Come on up and help me make
scientific observations on the ozone belt."

But the invitation was declined. The _Patriot_, however, will have a
good obituary notice of the professor all ready, in type.

CHAPTER XXXI.

_VARIOUS THINGS_.

It is a notorious fact that itinerant circus companies pay very
poorly, and that the man who does not get his money from them in
advance is not very likely to get it at all. Major Slott of _The
Patriot_ has suffered a good deal from these concerns; and when "The
Great European Circus and Metropolitan Caravan" tried to slip off the
other day without settling its advertising bill, he called upon the
sheriff and got him to attach the Bengal tiger for the debt. The tiger
was brought in its cage and placed in the composing-room, where it
consumed fifteen dollars' worth of meat in two days--the major's bill
was only twelve dollars--and scratched one trouser leg off of the
reporter, who was standing in front of the cage stirring up the animal
with a broom. On the third day the bottom fell out of the cage; and as
the tiger seemed to want to roam around a