as to emoluments. Well, in that case you
get the whole amount, and you spend it in perfectly useless things and
forget all about it after you've put it down in your return; and then
suddenly some Surveyor of Taxes writes and demands Income Tax on those
two hundred and fifty pounds, actually demands something like forty
pounds. I tell you, it goes through you like a knife."

"Haven't you any remedy?"

"Of course I could chuck the job," I said, "or do it for nothing. Yes, I
think I'll chuck it. It'll be a lesson to them."

"Yes," she said, "it would probably make the Government sit up--but, on
the whole, I don't think I should go so far if I were you. You see"--

"Go on," I said, for she was hesitating. "Let us strip ourselves of
everything at once and throw ourselves on the charity of our
neighbours."

"Well," she said, "I'd go on for a bit. A job's a job even if it does
make you pay. You've had L210 on balance, and you ought to be thankful
to have been allowed to pay forty pounds for munitions."

"And now," I said, "perhaps you'll let me get on with my work."

R. C. L.

* * * * *

The Pull-Through:

_Being a paraphrase of an answer in an O.T.C. examination._

Just one long pull, a straight strong pull--no other pull will do;
A man must never take two pulls to pull the pull-through through.

* * * * *

Village Amenities.

"The hearty congregational stinging was a feature of church life
to be proud of."--_Parish Magazine._

* * * * *

"WANTED.--Comfortable Home with private family for Gentleman who
is not strong in Brighton, Eastbourne, or St. Leonards."

_The Times._

The poor fellow should try Bournemouth or Torquay.

* * * * *

GETTING EVEN.

[Illustration: _Outraged victim of "Confidential Report" (being put to
bed prematurely_). "Please, God, Nurse _sewed_ for her soldier on
SUNDAY!"]

* * * * *

OUR BOOKING-OFFICE.

(_By Mr. Punch's Staff of Learned Clerks._)

If it should ever be your lot, which pray Heaven forbid, to be stranded
on the coast of Panama, seek out Miss WINIFRED JAMES as your hostess,
for she can teach you how to tolerate, and even in a way enjoy, an
existence one might have thought unendurable. She lives, I gather, some
two hundred miles or so from the Canal, in a town that is going to be
bu