medy that will soothe you?

Jeremy
Exactly!

Peacock
I have an infallible remedy. But, I have a scruple about curing you.

Jeremy
What's that?

Peacock
I think you should keep your asthma and seek a disability pension.

Jeremy
I like your idea.

(Enter Dudley from the house and Flem after him.)

Dudley
Murder! Help! Help! Fire!

Peacock
Why all this noise?

Jeremy
What do I see? There's a face I've seen before. Yes, my word, it
really is! It's Rosebud. Major, don't you recognize him?

Worthy
It's Rosebud all right. The deserter.

Dudley
Oh, yes, sir, it's me. I beg for pardon.

Jeremy
Coward! Fortune has delivered you to justice.

Dudley
Oh, Colonel, have pity on me.

Jeremy
Say, what! God! Why did you disappear without leave?

Dudley
The Captain was always beating me and there was nothing I could do!

Jeremy
For God's sake, abandon the battlefield because you were beaten? To
avenge yourself on your captain, couldn't you wait till after the
battle? Major, call Sergeant Slaughter and some soldiers to take this
deserter to the guardhouse.

(Exit Worthy to the street.)

Peacock
You never told me, you bastard, that you were a deserter.

Dudley
I never dared to tell you, sir.

Peacock
What a mess this wretch has got me in.

(Worthy returns with several soldiers.)

Sergeant Slaughter
What is it, sir?

Jeremy
Arrest that man.

Peacock
Sir, I beg you to pardon him.

Flem
We both ask you.

Jeremy (folding his arms)
It upsets me, gentlemen, not to be able to do as you wish. But, when
it comes to punishing infractions of military rules, I am inexorable.

Peacock
I will cure your asthma.

Jeremy
I should look to my pension.

Flem
I'll furnish you all the medicine you need for your old age.

Jeremy (after a struggle)
No. No. (to soldiers) Hurry up, take this clown without more
discussion. You will see that this poor devil will die as quickly in
my hands as in yours.

(Enter Trippet and Harriet.)

Trippet
What noise is this I hear? What brouhaha are you making here?

Dudley
Intercede for me, Trippet. They want to hang me as a deserter.

Trippet
Why, gentlemen, if you want to kill him, why not leave him in the
hands of Dr. Peacock?

Harriet
Grant him his life, Mr. Colonel.

Jeremy
No mercy.

Harriet
Be a human being.

Trippet
We beg you.

Jeremy
Don't pester me any more. Guards! Seize him!

Peacock (aside)
It's easy to see what the outcome will be w