e
use of boots by kicking you into the inn yard which is adjacent." So
saying I hurled him to the great front door which stood open, and
then, taking a sort of hop and skip, I kicked for glory and the
Saints.

I do not know that I ever kicked a man with more success. He shot out
as if he had been heaved by a catapult. There was a dreadful uproar
behind me, and I expected every moment to be stormed by the
waiter-and-pot-boy regiment. However I could hear some of the
gentlemen bystanding cry:

"Well done! Well kicked! A record! A miracle!"

But my first hours on English soil contained still other festivities.
Bright light streamed out from the great door, and I could plainly
note what I shall call the arc or arcs described by Forister. He
struck the railing once, but spun off it, and to my great astonishment
went headlong and slap-crash into some sort of an upper servant who
had been approaching the door with both arms loaded with cloaks,
cushions, and rugs.

I suppose the poor man thought that black doom had fallen upon him
from the sky. He gave a great howl as he, Forister, the cloaks,
cushions, and rugs spread out grandly in one sublime confusion.

Some ladies screamed, and a bold commanding voice said: "In the
devil's name what have we here?" Behind the unhappy servant had been
coming two ladies and a very tall gentleman in a black cloak that
reached to his heels. "What have we here?" again cried this tall man,
who looked like an old eagle. He stepped up to me haughtily. I knew
that I was face to face with the Earl of Westport.

But was I a man for ever in the wrong that I should always be giving
down and walking away with my tail between my legs? Not I; I stood
bravely to the Earl:

"If your lordship pleases, 'tis The O'Ruddy kicking a blackguard into
the yard," I made answer coolly.

I could see that he had been about to shout for the landlord and more
waiters and pot-boys, but at my naming myself he gave a quick stare.

"The O'Ruddy?" he repeated. "Rubbish!"

He was startled, bewildered; but I could not tell if he were glad or
grieved.

"'Tis all the name I own," I said placidly. "My father left it me
clear, it being something that he could not mortgage. 'Twas on his
death-bed he told me of lending you the breeches, and that is why I
kicked the man into the yard; and if your lordship had arrived sooner
I could have avoided this duel at daybreak, and, any how, I wonder at
his breeches fitting you. He