rmen don't shave their faces and ride 'osses. That's why I arsked
yer what yer thought of this 'ere war."

The chauffeur struggled into his jeans and adjusted them before
replying.

"If you're a sailor, the place for you is the navy," he remarked in a
superior manner. "As for the cavalry, the Cap'en, as you call him,
ought to have more sense----"

Chipmunk rose and swung his long arms threateningly.

"Look 'ere, young feller, do you want to have your blinkin' 'ead
knocked orf? Where the Cap'en goes, I goes, and don't you make any
mistake about it!"

"I didn't say anything," the chauffeur expostulated.

"Then don't say it. See? Keep your blinkin' 'ead shut and mind your
own business."

And, scowling fiercely and thrusting his empty pipe into his trousers
pocket, Chipmunk rolled away.

A few hours later Oliver, entering his room to dress for dinner, found
him standing in the light of the window laboriously fitting studs into
a shirt. The devoted fellow having gone to report to his master, had
found Burford engaged in his accustomed task of laying out his
master's evening clothes--Oliver during his stay in London had
provided himself with these necessaries. A jealous snarl had sent
Burford flying. So intent was he on his work, that he did not hear
Oliver enter. Oliver stood and watched him. Chipmunk was swearing
wholesomely under his breath. Oliver saw him take up the tail of the
shirt, spit on it and begin to rub something.

"Ker-ist!" said Chipmunk.

"What in the thundering blazes are you doing there?" cried Oliver.

Chipmunk turned.

"Oh, my God!" said Oliver.

Then he sank on a chair and laughed and laughed, and the more he
looked at Chipmunk the more he laughed. And Chipmunk stood stolid,
holding the shirt of the awful, wet, thumb-marked front. But it was
not at the shirt that Oliver laughed.

"Good God!" he cried, "were you born like that?"

For Chipmunk, having gone to the barber's, was clean-shaven, and
revealed himself as one of the most comically ugly of the sons of men.

"Never mind," said Oliver, after a while, "you've made the sacrifice
for your country."

"And wot if I get the face-ache?"

"I'd get something that looked like a face before I'd talk of it,"
grinned Oliver.

At the family dinner-table, Doggie being present, he announced his
intentions. It was the duty of every able-bodied man to fight for the
Empire. Had not half a million just been called for? We should want a
jolly s