me in going away to
England, so that I might escape from the great vexation and eyesore
which the empty college would have produced.

But I had to bid farewell to my wife and my son, and to Eva and
Crasweller. The first task would be the easier, because there would
be no necessity for any painful allusion to my own want of success.
In what little I might say to Mrs Neverbend on the subject, I could
continue that tone of sarcastic triumph in which I had replied to
Sir Ferdinando. What was pathetic in the matter I might altogether
ignore. And Jack was himself so happy in his nature, and so little
likely to look at anything on its sorrowful side, that all would
surely go well with him. But with Eva, and with Eva's father, things
would be different. Words must be spoken which would be painful in
the speaking, and regrets must be uttered by me which could not
certainly be shared by him. "I am broken down and trampled upon, and
all the glory is departed from my name, and I have become a byword
and a reproach rather than a term of honour in which future ages may
rejoice, because I have been unable to carry out my long-cherished
purpose by--depositing you, and insuring at least your departure!"
And then Crasweller would answer me with his general kindly feeling,
and I should feel at the moment of my leaving him the hollowness of
his words. I had loved him the better because I had endeavoured to
commence my experiment on his body. I had felt a vicarious regard
for the honour which would have been done him, almost regarding it
as though I myself were to go in his place. All this had received a
check when he in his weakness had pleaded for another year. But he
had yielded; and though he had yielded without fortitude, he had done
so to comply with my wishes, and I could not but feel for the man an
extraordinary affection. I was going to England, and might probably
never see him again; and I was going with aspirations in my heart so
very different from those which he entertained!

From the hours intended for slumber, a few minutes could be taken for
saying adieu to my wife. "My dear," said I, "this is all very sudden.
But a man engaged in public life has to fit himself to the public
demands. Had I not promised to go to-day, I might have been taken
away yesterday or the day before."

"Oh, John," said she, "I think that everything has been put up to
make you comfortable."

"Thanks; yes, I'm sure of it. When you hear my name ment