my heart was sad within me would give no fair record of my condition.
I was so crushed by grief, so obliterated by the agony of the hour,
that I hardly saw what passed before my eyes. I only knew that the
day had come, the terrible day for which in my ignorance I had
yearned, and that I was totally unable to go through its ceremonies
with dignity, or even with composure. But I observed as I was driven
down the street, lying out at sea many miles to the left, a small
spot of smoke on the horizon, as though it might be of some passing
vessel. It did not in the least awaken my attention; but there it
was, and I remembered to have thought as I passed on how blessed were
they who steamed by unconscious of that terrible ordeal of the Fixed
Period which I was bound to encounter.

I went to Little Christchurch, and there I found Mr Crasweller
waiting for me in the hall. I came in and took his limp hand in
mine, and congratulated him. Oh how vain, how wretched, sounded that
congratulation in my own ears!

And it was spoken, I was aware, in a piteous tone of voice, and with
meagre, bated breath. He merely shook his head, and attempted to pass
on. "Will you not take your greatcoat?" said I, seeing that he was
going out into the open air without protection.

"No; why should I? It will not be wanted up there."

"You do not know the place," I replied. "There are twenty acres of
pleasure-ground for you to wander over." Then he turned upon me
a look,--oh, such a look!--and went on and took his place in the
carriage. But Eva followed him, and spread a rug across his knees,
and threw a cloak over his shoulders.

"Will not Eva come with us?" I said.

"No; my daughter will hide her face on such a day as this. It is for
you and me to be carried through the city,--you because you are proud
of the pageant, and me because I do not fear it." This, too, added
something to my sorrow. Then I looked and saw that Eva got into a
small closed carriage in the rear, and was driven off by a circuitous
route, to meet us, no doubt, at the college.

As we were driven away,--Crasweller and I,--I had not a word to say
to him. And he seemed to collect himself in his fierceness, and to
remain obdurately silent in his anger. In this way we drove on, till,
coming to a turn of the road, the expanse of the sea appeared before
us. Here again I observed a small cloud of smoke which had grown out
of the spot I had before seen, and I was aware that some large