els. These
delicacies, the Secretary of the company explained, weighed about a ton
each, and Hopper was the only man who was strong enough to lift them out
of the ovens into the delivery wagon.

_A Member of the Board._ That is just the kind of man they want in the
army.

The Secretary of the company stated as an additional ground for
exemption that Hopper had a wooden leg and bronchitis. He was put back
one group to give time for medical treatment of leg.

James Ponks (19), who appeared somewhat dazed at his surroundings,
explained in a confidential whisper that he was the caretaker of the
municipal macaroni beds in Regent's Park. Asked if he would not like to
fight for his country, he replied that he would, only MARTIN Luther had
appeared to him in a dream and ordered him to go into the dressed
poultry business. Referred to the Medical authorities.

Jim Bounce (30) stated that he had a conscientious objection to
fighting. He didn't like the Germans, but recognised that they were his
spiritual brothers.

_A Member of the Board._ Where did you get that cauliflower ear?

Owing to the unsatisfactory nature of the applicant's reply his appeal
was refused.

Arthur Small (35), proprietor of a fish and chips emporium, stated that
he was a widower and the sole support of his mother-in-law, two married
sisters-in-law, their husbands and their thirteen small children.

_The Chairman._ It seems a clear case for exemption.

Applicant hastened to explain that he did not ask for exemption as he
felt that his first duty was to his country. He would like, however, a
week in which to say good-bye to his relations by marriage. The request
was granted, the Chairman stating that the attitude of Small, who was
sacrificing everything for duty, did him the greatest credit.

* * * * *

[Illustration: HAVEN.

On the famous site of The Star and Garter Hotel at Richmond Hill, a Home
is to be built for Soldiers and Sailors totally disabled by the War. The
work has been undertaken by the British Women's Hospital, and, on its
completion, Her Majesty the Queen will present the building to the
British Red Cross Society, by whom it will be maintained. The cost of
construction will be L50,000. Mr. Punch can think of no cause which
should appeal more strongly to the gratitude of the nation and he begs
his generous readers to send gifts in aid of it to The Hon. Treasurer,
"Star and Garter" Building Fund, 21, O