which awaited him.
With true chivalry young ladies' schools had been given the best
positions on the wharf, and Sam soon found himself passing through a
double row of pretty girls. He could hear such remarks as this:

"Isn't he good-looking!"

"What a lovely uniform!"

"Hasn't he got a fascinating limp!"

"How pale he is!"

"He does look just like a hero."

Sam flushed slightly at these comments, but suddenly, before he had
time to collect his thoughts, a slight form sprang forward from the
left and an inviting face presented itself to his, and with the words,
"May I, please?" a hearty kiss was planted on his lips. Sam had no
time to decline, if he had wished to. A murmur of surprise and delight
arose from the crowd, and in another moment another damsel rushed upon
him, and then another and another. Before long he was the center of a
throng of elbowing young ladies of all kinds, fair, plain, and
indifferent, all bent upon giving him a kiss. Sam had indeed lost his
nerve; for the first time in his life he capitulated absolutely and let
the attacking party work its sweet will. It was with great difficulty
that he was rescued by the reception committee and finally seated next
to the Mayor in the landau.

"What a lot of cab-drivers you have there on the wharf!" said Sam to
the Mayor, after their first greetings. "I never saw so many. Hear them
crying out to the passengers coming ashore!"

"They're not cab-drivers," he answered. "They're pension agents.
They're not crying 'Want a cab?' but 'Want a pension?'"

"So they are," said Sam. "What is that tune the young ladies are
beginning to sing?"

"Don't you know?" said the Mayor, laughing. "It's 'Captain Jinks.'
You'll know it well enough before you are here long. Listen."

Sam listened and heard sung for the first time lines that were to be
imprinted upon his tympanum until they became a torture:

"I'm Captain Jinks of the Cubapines,
The pink of human war-machines,
Who teaches emperors, kings, and queens
The way to run an army."

The news of the kissing reached the City Hall before the procession,
and when he alighted there Sam had to kiss an immense number of women
who were determined not to be outdone by their sisters at the wharf,
while the whole crowd sang "Captain Jinks" in a frenzy of enthusiasm.
The reception accorded to Sam at St. Kisco was so elaborate, and the
arrangements made to do him