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a line in traction-guns. We had struck a warehouse dignity in dealing with the stocks. It was, "Sign here, Mr. Eddie!" "Clarkson, forward to the socks!" Our floor-walker was a major, with a nozzle like a peach, And a stutter in his Trilbies; and a limping kind of speech. We were off at eight to business, we were free for lunch at one, And we talked of new Spring fashions, and the brisk trade being done. After five we sought our dugouts lying snug beneath the hill, Each with hollyhocks before it and geraniums on the sill. Singing "Home, Sweet home," we swept, and scrubbed, and dusted up the place, Then smoked out on the doorstep in the twi- light's tender grace. After which with spade and rake we sought our special garden plot, And we 'tended to the cabbage and the shrink- ing young shallot. So long lived we unmolested that this seemed indeed "the life." Set apart from mirk and worry and the inci- dence of strife; And we trimmed our Kitchen Eden, swapping vegetable lore, Whi1e the whole demented world beside was muddled up with war. There was little talk of Boches and of bloody battle scenes, But a deal about Bill's spuds and Billy Carkeek's butter-beans; Porky specialised on onion and he had a sort of gift For a cabbage plump and tender that it took two men to lift. In the pleasant Sabbath morning, when the sun lit on our "street," And illumed the happy dugout with effulgence kind and sweet, It was fine to see us forking, raking, picking off the bugs, Treading flat the snails and woodlice and demolishing the slugs. Then one day old Fritz got going. He had a hint of us, And the shell the blighter posted was as roomy as a 'bus; He was groping round the dump, and kind of pecking after it; When he plugged the hill the world heeled up, the dome of heaven split. Then, 0 Gott and consternation! Swooped a shell a and stuck her nose In Carkeek's beans. Those beans came up! A cry of grief arose! As we watched them--plunk! another shell cut loose, and everywhere Flew the spuds of Billy Murphy. There were turnips in the air. Bill! she tore a quarter-acre from the land- scape. With it burst Tommy's carrots, and we watched them, and in whispers prayed and cursed. Then a wail of anguish 'scaped us. Boomed in Porky's cabbage plot A detestable concussion. Porky's cabbages were n
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