--no, I don't mean _Pinafore_--I mean--you know what I
mean--the other thing, you know. You must all join in the chorus, you
know."

[_Murmurs of delight and anxiety to join in the chorus. Brilliant
performance of prelude to the Judge's song in "Trial by Jury" by nervous
pianist. Moment arrives for Harris to join in. Harris takes no notice of
it. Nervous pianist commences prelude over again, and Harris, commencing
singing at the same time, dashes off the first two lines of the First
Lord's song out of "Pinafore." Nervous pianist tries to push on with
prelude, gives it up, and tries to follow Harris with the accompaniment
to the Judge's song out of "Trial by Jury," finds that doesn't answer,
and tries to recollect what he is doing, and where he is, feels his mind
giving way, and stops short_.]

HARRIS (_with kindly encouragement_): "It's all right. You're doing very
well, indeed--go on."

NERVOUS PIANIST: "I'm afraid there's a mistake somewhere. What are you
singing?"

HARRIS _(promptly):_ "Why, the Judge's song out of _Trial by Jury_.
Don't you know it?"

SOME FRIEND OF HARRIS'S (_from the back of the room_): "No, you're not,
you chucklehead, you're singing the Admiral's song from _Pinafore_."

[_Long argument between Harris and Harris's friend as to what Harris is
really singing. Friend finally suggests that it doesn't matter what
Harris is singing so long as Harris gets on and sings it, and Harris,
with an evident sense of injustice rankling inside him, requests pianist
to begin again. Pianist, thereupon, starts prelude to the Admiral's
song, and Harris, seizing what he considers to be a favorable opening in
the music, begins:_]

HARRIS:

"'When I was young and called to the Bar.'"

[_General roar of laughter, taken by Harris as a compliment. Pianist,
thinking of his wife and family, gives up the unequal contest and
retires: his place being taken by a stronger-nerved man._]

THE NEW PIANIST _(cheerily):_ "Now then, old man, you start off, and
I'll follow. We won't bother about any prelude."

HARRIS (_upon whom the explanation of matters has slowly
dawned--laughing_): "By Jove! I beg your pardon. Of course--I've been
mixing up the two songs. It was Jenkins confused me, you know. Now
then."

[_Singing; his voice appearing to come from the cellar, and suggesting
the first low warnings of an approaching earthquake_.]

"'When I was young I served a term As office-boy to an attorney's
firm.'"

_(As