ress. LETTER FROM
CLARENCE LINDEN, ESQ., TO THE DUKE OF HAVERFIELD. HOTEL ----,
CALAIS.

My Dear Duke,--After your kind letter, you will forgive me for not
having called upon you before I left England, for you have led me to
hope that I may dispense with ceremony towards you; and, in sad and
sober earnest, I was in no mood to visit even you during the few days
I was in London, previous to my departure. Some French philosopher has
said that, 'the best compliment we can pay our friends, when in sickness
or misfortune, is to avoid them.' I will not say how far I disagree
with this sentiment, but I know that a French philosopher will be an
unanswerable authority with you; and so I will take shelter even under
the battery of an enemy.

I am waiting here for some days in expectation of Lord Aspeden's
arrival. Sick as I was of England and all that has lately occurred to
me there, I was glad to have an opportunity of leaving it sooner than my
chief could do; and I amuse myself very indifferently in this dull town,
with reading all the morning, plays all the evening, and dreams of my
happier friends all the night.

And so you are sorry that I did not destroy Lord Borodaile. My dear
duke, you would have been much more sorry if I had! What could you
then have done for a living Pasquin for your stray lampoons and vagrant
sarcasms? Had an unfortunate bullet carried away--

"That peer of England, pillar of the state,"

as you term him, pray on whom could 'Duke Humphrey unfold his
griefs'?--Ah, Duke, better as it is, believe me; and, whenever you
are at a loss for a subject for wit, you will find cause to bless my
forbearance, and congratulate yourself upon the existence of its object.

Dare I hope that, amidst all the gayeties which court you, you will
find time to write to me? If so, you shall have in return the earliest
intelligence of every new soprano, and the most elaborate criticisms on
every budding figurante of our court.

Have you met Trollolop lately, and in what new pursuit are his
intellectual energies engaged? There, you see, I have fairly entrapped
your Grace into a question which common courtesy will oblige you to
answer.

Adieu, ever, my dear Duke. Most truly yours, etc.

LETTER FROM THE DUKE OF HAVERFIELD TO CLARENCE LINDEN, ESQ.

A thousand thanks, mon cher, for your letter, though it was certainly
less amusing and animated than I could have wished it for your sake, as
well as my own; ye