"'You ought t' try, cook,' says the skipper, 'for the sake o' the
crew. We'll all die,' says he, 'afore we sights ol' Bully Dick agin,'
says he, 'if you keeps on burnin' the water. You _got_ t' get married,
cook, t' the first likely maid you sees on the Labrador,' says he, 't'
save the crew. She'd do the cookin' for you. It'll be the loss o' all
hands,' says he, 'an you don't. This here burned water,' says he,
'will be the end of us, cook, an you keeps it up.'

"'I'd be wonderful glad t' 'blige you, skipper,' says the cook, 'an'
I'd like t' 'blige all hands. 'Twon't be by my wish,' says he, 'that
anybody'll die o' the grub they gets, for mother wouldn't like it.'

"'Cook,' says the skipper, 'shake! I knows a _man,_' says he, 'when I
sees one. Any man,' says he, 'that would put on the irons o'
matrimony,' says he, 't' 'blige a shipmate,' says he, 'is a better man
'n me, an' I loves un like a brother.'

"The cook was cheered up considerable.

"'Cook,' says the skipper, 'I 'pologize. Yes, I do, cook,' says he, 'I
'pologize.'

"'I isn't got no feelin' ag'in' matrimony,' says the cook. 'But I
isn't able t' get took. I been tryin' every maid t' Twist Tickle,'
says he, 'an' they isn't one,' says he, 'will wed a fool.'

"'Not _one_ maid t' wed a fool!' says the skipper.

"'Nar a one,' says the cook.

"'I'm s'prised,' says the skipper.

"'Nar a maid t' Twist Tickle,' says the cook, 'will wed a fool, an' I
'low they isn't one,' says he, 'on the Labrador.'

"'It's been done afore, cook,' says the skipper, 'an' I 'low 'twill be
done agin, if the world don't come to an end t' oncet. Cook,' says he,
'I _knows_ the maid t' do it.'

"'I'd be wonderful glad t' find _she_,' says the cook. 'Mother,' says
he, 'always 'lowed a man didn't ought t' live alone.'

"'Ay, b'y,' says the skipper, 'I got the girl for _you_. An' she isn't
a thousand miles,' says he, 'from where that ol' basket of a _Quick as
Wink_ lies at anchor,' says he, 'in Whoopin' Harbor. She isn't what
you'd call handsome an' tell no lie,' says he, 'but--'

"'Never you mind about that, skipper,' says the cook.

"'No,' says the skipper, 'she isn't handsome, as handsome goes, even
in these parts, but--'

"'Never you mind, skipper,' says the cook: 'for mother always 'lowed
that looks come off in the first washin'.'

"'I 'low that Liz Jones would take you, cook,' says the skipper. 'You
ain't much on wits, but you got a good-lookin' figure-head; an' I 'low
she'