light, to examine it:--daylight, that comes, and reduces
the egg to a walnut-shell!--Poor Brown's hat will not go on, for the
excrescence, so he cannot go to church. At breakfast he recounts his
dream--which is voted fudge by Mamma, stuff by Angelina, and rubbish by
Jemima; for they are in no very good humour after the excitement of last
week. Little Tom is in bed, having broken his fast upon jalap,
administered to counteract the baneful effects of the sweets consumed
yesterday--the youth being full as a sack of sand; and, we think, could
an anatomist have given a section of the different strata of food that
body contained, in the spirit of a geologist, he would have presented a
remarkable series of deposits. But, away with scientific speculations,
to the Browns, who are at breakfast--a meal that has been intruded upon
by John; who has recounted enough of a certain story to put Jemima in
hysterics, and Angelina in a fainting fit--bringing down a hurricane of
abuse upon him--John, the impertinent menial--John, the venomous viper,
that has recoiled upon its benefactor--John, the dark villain, that has
plotted with the unworthy man, Spohf, who, of course, out of mere envy,
mere spite, mere jealousy, would try to overturn that harmony that is
not to be broken so easily--that unity that is not to be severed, no,
not for a hundred Spohfs! "Go--go, sir, to your fiddling
garret-friend--go and blow his hurdigurdy!--Go, sir!--Tell him the
affections of innocent females are not to be played upon like a _base
vile_!--Tell him there are ears to pull, horsewhips to be had, ay, and
noble gentlemen ever ready to lay on in defence of those scandalously
reviled! You may tremble, sir, for menials can be discharged, and have
characters to lose! Sir, I give you warning!--Sir, you may go!--Go,
sir!"

Now, this is the very thing John much wished to do:--he had been
imperceptibly backing, for the last five minutes, towards the door,
fearing to turn tail upon the enemy--the choleric Mr. and Mrs. Brown;
who appeared, in their very fierceness, to counteract each other's
fire--each pulling the other back, seeming to get more and more
ferocious the nearer their victim gained the door,--for, when the baited
John reached it, he turned the handle of the lock behind him, still
facing his antagonists, intending to escape by a side lurch; but, just
at that critical point, there came a knock of great importance at the
outer door, as if the chimney were on