I do believe that on his death-bed (and he was
not far from a very hard one yesterday), he will tell us how he died so
many thousand years ago, of the same complaint. And that gunner of ours
is a fool. Would you believe it, Mr Simple, he went crying about the
decks, 'O my poor guns, what will become of them if they break loose?'
He appeared to consider it of no consequence if the ship and ship's
company were all lost, provided that his guns were safely landed on the
beach.
"'Mr Dispart,' said I, at last, 'allow me to observe, in the most
delicate way in the world, that you're a d----d old fool.' You see, Mr
Simple, it's the duty of an officer to generalise, and be attentive to
parts, only in consideration of the safety of the whole. I look after my
anchors and cables, as I do after the rigging; not that I care for any
of them in particular, but because the safety of a ship depends upon her
being well found. I might just as well cry because we sacrificed an
anchor and cable yesterday morning, to save the ship from going on
shore."
"Very true, Mr Chucks," replied I.
"Private feelings," continued he, "must always be sacrificed for the
public service. As you know, the lower deck was full of water, and all
our cabins and chests were afloat; but I did not think then about my
shirts, and look at them now, all blowing out in the forerigging,
without a particle of starch left in the collars or the frills. I shall
not be able to appear as an officer ought to do for the whole of the
cruise."
As he said this, the cooper, going forward, passed by him, and jostled
him in passing. "Beg pardon, sir," said the man, "but the ship lurched."
"The ship lurched, did it?" replied the boatswain, who, I am afraid, was
not in the best of humours about his wardrobe. "And pray, Mr Cooper, why
has heaven granted you two legs, with joints at the knees, except to
enable you to counteract the horizontal deviation? Do you suppose they
were meant for nothing but to work round a cask with? Hark, sir, did you
take me for a post to scrub your pig's hide against? Allow me just to
observe, Mr Cooper--just to insinuate, that when you pass an officer, it
is your duty to keep at a respectable distance, and not to soil his
clothes with your rusty iron jacket. Do you comprehend me, sir; or will
this make you recollect in future?" The rattan was raised, and descended
in a shower of blows, until the cooper made his escape into the head.
"There, take that
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