of striped stockings on over his arms, and a pair of shoes on his
hands, ornamented on insteps with large rosettes._ TEDDY _stands
behind him and thrusts his arms as far as they will go under_ PATSY'S
_armpits. A kind of a tunic covers both. Wear a large crimped frill or
an enormous turned-down collar._

PATSY _stands behind table and places his shoe-clad hands upon it,
which represent the feet of the dwarf. The door curtains are fastened
together a few inches above his head, concealing_ TEDDY.

PATSY _must lean slightly over the table or the legs will not appear
to support the body._

_When the curtain is up, enter_ MATSY _from L. dressed as a Showman._

MATSY (_bows to audience, speaks in a loud voice, using megaphone_).

Come and see Jumbo, Samson symbolical!
Come and see Slivers, Clown really comical!
Come and see Zip, the foremost of freaks!
Come and see Palestine's Sinister Sheiks!
Eager Equestriennes, each unexcelled,
Most mammoth menagerie ever beheld,
The Giant, the Fat Girl, the Lion-faced Man,
Aerial Artists from far-off Japan,
Audacious Acrobats shot from a gun,
Don't miss the greatest show under the sun!

Now, if you will kindly lend me your ears for a moment, I will fill
them free of charge with a few words concerning the world's greatest
assortment of marvelous monstrosities. In the first cell we have Senor
Macaroni Spaghetti from the land of the banana. The senor is
thirty-nine inches high, and, strangely enough, thirty-nine years old,
to say nothing of the fact that he weighs thirty-nine pounds. (PATSY
_scratches his nose with his foot._) He arrived last week by parcel
post to join our circus. The senor is looking for a wife. Oh, you
needn't laugh! It's true. Some of you near-sighted ladies should have
brought magnifying glasses, for Senor Macaroni Spaghetti is the
smallest speck of humanity that ever lived in captivity. He stands on
a silver dollar and puts his hand in a thimble. (TEDDY _makes funny
gestures during this entire speech._) The senor will now entertain you
in his entertaining way.

PATSY (_sings_).

SPAGHETTI FROM OLD ITALY.

(Music on page 107)

Me name is Spaghetti, I came o'er the sea,
To visit this land from old Italy,
I have a small monkey, he jumps with a string,
And if he was here to you he would sing:
(_Dances._)
Tee-oodle, dum-doodle, dum-doodle, dum day!

(_Repeat until e