. [She hears ARKADINA and TRIGORIN laughing in the
distance, runs to the door on the left and looks through the keyhole] He
is there too. [She goes back to TREPLIEFF] Ah, well--no matter. He
does not believe in the theatre; he used to laugh at my dreams, so that
little by little I became down-hearted and ceased to believe in it too.
Then came all the cares of love, the continual anxiety about my little
one, so that I soon grew trivial and spiritless, and played my parts
without meaning. I never knew what to do with my hands, and I could not
walk properly or control my voice. You cannot imagine the state of mind
of one who knows as he goes through a play how terribly badly he is
acting. I am a sea-gull--no--no, that is not what I meant to say. Do you
remember how you shot a seagull once? A man chanced to pass that way and
destroyed it out of idleness. That is an idea for a short story, but it
is not what I meant to say. [She passes her hand across her forehead]
What was I saying? Oh, yes, the stage. I have changed now. Now I am a
real actress. I act with joy, with exaltation, I am intoxicated by it,
and feel that I am superb. I have been walking and walking, and thinking
and thinking, ever since I have been here, and I feel the strength of
my spirit growing in me every day. I know now, I understand at last,
Constantine, that for us, whether we write or act, it is not the honour
and glory of which I have dreamt that is important, it is the strength
to endure. One must know how to bear one's cross, and one must have
faith. I believe, and so do not suffer so much, and when I think of my
calling I do not fear life.

TREPLIEFF. [Sadly] You have found your way, you know where you are
going, but I am still groping in a chaos of phantoms and dreams, not
knowing whom and what end I am serving by it all. I do not believe in
anything, and I do not know what my calling is.

NINA. [Listening] Hush! I must go. Good-bye. When I have become a
famous actress you must come and see me. Will you promise to come? But
now--[She takes his hand] it is late. I can hardly stand. I am fainting.
I am hungry.

TREPLIEFF. Stay, and let me bring you some supper.

NINA. No, no--and don't come out, I can find the way alone. My carriage
is not far away. So she brought him back with her? However, what
difference can that make to me? Don't tell Trigorin anything when you
see him. I love him--I love him even more than I used to. It is an idea
for a shor