e world, I began to tell them a little of her
fame, and that she had been recently offered 40,000 pounds to sing for
three months in America.

They were incredulous. Forty thousand pounds! Ten times as much as "pa"
had given for a paid-up selection he had lately bought. They told me it
was no use of me trying to tell them fibs. No one would give a woman
anything to sine, not even one pound. Why, Susie Duffy was the best
singer on the Murrumbidgee, and she would sing for any one who asked her,
and free of charge.

At this juncture Jimmy, who had been absent, came to see the show. After
gazing for a few seconds he remarked what the others had failed to
observe, "Why, the woman's naked!"

I attempted to explain that among rich people in high society it was
customary to dress like that in the evening, and that it looked very
pretty.

Mrs M'Swat admonished me for showing the children low pictures.

"She must be a very bold woman," said Jimmy; and Lizer pronounced her mad
because, as she put it, "It's a wonder she'd be half-undressed in her
photo; you'd think she oughter dress herself up complete then."

Lizer certainly acted upon this principle, as a photo of her, which had
been taken by a travelling artist, bore evidence that for the occasion
she had arrayed herself in two pairs of ill-fitting cuffs, Peter's watch
and chain, strings, jackets, flowers, and other gewgaws galore.

"There ain't no such person as Madame Melber; it's only a fairy-tale,"
said Mrs M'Swat.

"Did you ever hear of Gladstone?" I inquired.

"No; where is that place?"

"Did you ever hear of Jesus Christ?"

"Sure, yes; he's got something to do with God, ain't he?"

After that I never attempted to enlighten them regarding our celebrities.

Oh, how I envied them their ignorant contentment! They were as ducks on a
duck-pond; but I was as a duck forced for ever to live in a desert, ever
wildly longing for water, but never reaching it outside of dreams.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE

Mr M'Swat and I Have a Bust-up

Men only, and they merely on business, came to Barney's Gap--women
tabooed the place. Some of them told me they would come to see me, but
not Mrs M'Swat, as she always allowed the children to be as rude to them
as they pleased. With the few individuals who chanced to come M'Swat
would sit down, light his pipe, and vulgarly and profusely expectorate on
the floor, while they yarned and yarned for hours and hours about the
price o