d. "Why are you drinking tea?"

"We are drinking tea," replied the Clerical Collar, "so that we can
engage in theological disputation without cutting one another's
throats."

"What is the dispute about?" asked Gud.

The Black Bathrobe made answer and said: "It concerns our belief in
Gud."

"May I join you?" inquired Gud.

"Delighted!" cried the Vest with the Silver Horseshoes, not recognizing
the caller.

Gud sat down and the Clerical Collar poured him a cup of hot water, but
neglected to pass him the tea ball. Not wishing to attract attention to
the oversight, which he realized was due to the host's being absorbed in
spiritual matters, Gud was about to convert the water into tea by a
miracle. Upon second thought he refrained, lest the display of
miraculous power would reveal his incognito. Still Gud did not like the
idea of drinking water straight; so instead of performing a miracle he
reached over and helped himself to the tea ball--noting, as he did so,
how much simpler it is to get results by natural laws than by
unnecessary miracles.

The venerable Beard being less wrought up over the disputation,
explained the nature of the meeting to the newcomer. Said he: "We are
all worshipers and ministers of the one true Gud, having been born and
baptised in the faith and duly ordained in its ministry. But of late
certain heresies have arisen among us, and we are gathered here to
ferret out the heretic and bring him to the bar of ecclesiastical
justice. Sad to confess, I find that I alone have remained staunch in
our faith, which is founded on the rock of unchanging truth."

"Liar," cried out the Spectacles of the Student, "we modernists are also
staunch in the faith; it is merely the conceit of fundamentalist bigotry
to argue that truth cannot be changed. Indeed, it must be changed or
intelligent people will cease to believe it."

"You are more accurate than expedient," admonished the Vest with the
Silver Horseshoes. "The faith of the people is waning fast, but it will
never be restored by your muddled mixtures of science and psychology.
What is needed is a great faith-arousing event, such as the trial and
burning of a heretic, and for that purpose are we assembled here."

"Sad, but true," agreed the Threadbare Coat. "Any burning at the stake
would tend to revive faith, but the revival would be much stronger if
the burning flesh savored of heresy."

"What?" shrieked the horrified Spectacles of the Student. "Is