things."

Sez he, "I am doin' this for political reasons, Samantha, and can't be
hampered by domestic reasons and ignorance." And he kep' on tyin' the
bow on his foretop.

Sez I, "For the sake of your children and grandchildren won't you
desist and not put 'em to shame and make a laughin' stock of yourself
before Miss Meechim and Arvilly and all the rest?"

"I shall do my duty, Samantha," sez he, and he pulled out the ribbin
of the bow, so that it sot out some like a turban over his forward.
"Of course I look very dressy and pretty in this costoom, but that is
not my reason for wearin' it; you and Arvilly are always talking about
political men who don't come up to the mark and do their duty by their
constituents. I am a very influential man, Samantha, and there is no
tellin' how much good I shall do my country this day, and the sneers
of the multitude shall not deter me."

Sez I, almost fearfully, "Think of the meetin' house, Josiah, where
you're a deacon and looked up to; what will they say to hear of this,
passin' yourself off for a Chinaman; dressin' up in petticoats and red
ribbins!"

Sez he, cranin' his neck round to see the bow hangin' down his back,
"Our old forefathers went through worse trials than this when they eat
their cartridge boxes and friz themselves at Valley Forge," and he
fingered some of them bows and ornaments on his breast agin with a
vain, conceited smirk of satisfaction. I wuz at my wits' end; I
glanced at the door; there wuz no lock on it; what should I do?
Religion and common sense wouldn't move him, and as for my sharpest
weepon--good vittles--here I wuz hampered, I couldn't cook 'em for
him, what could I do?

Sez he agin, "I only do this for patriotism; I sacrifice myself on the
altar of my country," and he fanned himself gracefully, lookin'
sarahuptishly into the glass.

"Well," sez I, growin' calm as I thought of a forlorn hope, "mebby it
is best, Josiah, and I hain't a-goin' to be outdone by you in
patriotism. I too will sacrifice myself." And I proceeded to comb my
hair with a firm look on my face. He looked alarmed.

"What do you mean, Samantha?" sez he.

"I won't let you go ahead of me in sacrificing yourself, Josiah. No, I
will go fur ahead of what you or anybody else would do; it will most
probable kill me, but I shall not falter."

"What is it, Samantha?" sez he, droppin' the fan and approachin' me
with agitated mean. "What are you goin' to do? If it is to throw
yours