stand as firm in
defence of his own rights, and pursue his plans as steadily and unmoved
as the most impudent man alive; but then he does it with a seeming
modesty. Thus, manner is every thing; what is impudence in one is proper
assurance only in another: for firmness is commendable, but an
overbearing conduct is disgustful.

20. Forwardness being the very reverse of modesty, follow rather than
lead the company; that is, join in discourse upon their subjects rather
than start one of your own; if you have parts, you will have
opportunities enough of shewing them on every topic of conversation; and
if you have none, it is better to expose yourself upon a subject of
other people's, than on one of your own.

21. But be particularly careful not to speak of yourself if you can help
it. An impudent fellow lugs in himself abruptly upon all occasions, and
is ever the here of his own story. Others will colour their arrogance
with, "It may seem strange indeed, that I should talk in this manner of
myself; it is what I by no means like, and should never do, if I had not
been cruelly and unjustly accused; but when my character is attacked, it
is a justice I owe to myself to defend it." This veil is too thin not to
be seen through on the first inspection.

22. Others again, with more art, will _modestly_ boast of all the
principal virtues, by calling these virtues weaknesses, and saying, they
are so unfortunate as to fall into those weaknesses. "I cannot see
persons suffer," says one of his cast, "without relieving them; though
my circumstances are very unable to afford it--I cannot avoid speaking
truth; though it is often very imprudent;" and so on.

23. This angling for praise is so prevailing a principle, that it
frequently stoops to the lowest object. Men will often boast of doing
that, which, if true, would be rather a disgrace to them than otherwise.
One man affirms that he rode twenty miles within the hour: 'tis probably
a lie; but suppose he did, what then? He had a good horse under him,
and is a good jockey. Another swears he has often at a sitting, drank
five or six bottles to his own share. Out of respect to him, I will
believe _him_ a liar; for I would not wish to think him a beast.

24. These and many more are the follies of idle people, which, while
they think they procure them esteem, in reality make them despised.

To avoid this contempt, therefore, never speak of yourself at all,
unless necessity obliges you; a