Y, published some years since,
it was stated that he was born with a mole upon his left arm. This may
or may not be the case; but, judging from the persistence with which the
great agriculturist advocates sub-soil ploughing, there can be no doubt
whatever that he has mole on the brain.

* * * * *

BLOOD AND THUNDER!

PUNCHINELLO learns, without the least surprise, that Mr. YOUNGBLOOD has
retired in disgust from the management of the New York _Free Press_. It
is further announced that the estimable publication referred to will
henceforth be under the charge of Mr. OLDBLOOD, a blood relative of all
the BADBLOODS belonging to the JOHN REAL Democracy.

* * * * *

"FALL" WEATHER.

The subject of bringing down rain by the firing of artillery has again
been revived, owing to the long droughts that have lately prevailed.
What gives a color of feasibility to it, at present, is the fact that
the Reign of LOUIS NAPOLEON has lately been brought down by Prussian
guns.

* * * * *

[Illustration: A SIGHT TOO BAD!

_Struggling Cuba._ "YOU MUST BE AWFULLY NEAR-SIGHTED, MR. PRESIDENT, NOT
TO RECOGNIZE ME."

_U. S. G._ "NO: I AM FAR-SIGHTED; FOR I CAN RECOGNIZE FRANCE."]

* * * * *

HIRAM GREEN'S POLITICAL SENTIMENTS.

His Reason for Leaving his Party.--A Catechism for Candidates.

I hain't gilty of any stated polertix, as Ime aware of.

For an old man, Ime helthy and sound as a nut on all public questions. I
use to be an old line Whig, and was a pooty active thimble-rigger as
long as it paid. But when that party refoosed to renominate me for the
offis of Gustese of the Peece, like a thurar bred polertician, I shook
'em. Said I, standin' ontop a sugar hogshead, at a primary meetin, which
was bein held in SIMMINSES grocery store:--

Feller sitizens of the Whig party, Refoose to renominate good men for
offisses, and you can pack your duds and git your carpet bags checkt for
the next steamer goin up Salt River.

Leave my name off'n your ticket for another term of offis, and there
won't be enuff left in your old politikle carciss to grease a flap-jack
griddle with. In the words of Mister--Mister--Somebody, "A word to the
wise is--is--enuff to make a--hoss laff."

And here I say it, Mister PUNCHINELLO, I wasent nominated.

Dident I smash things? Gess not! I norgarated a bolt which spread like
pour