of the question, but when the time fixed was about to arrive I
found myself billed for a debate with no less an adversary than William
McKinley, protectionist leader in the Lower House of Congress. We were
the best of friends and I much objected to a joint meeting. The parties,
however, would take no denial, and it was arranged that we should be
given alternate dates. Then it appeared that the designated thesis read:
"Which political party offers for the workingman the best solution of
the tariff problem?"

Here was a poser. It required special preparation, for which I had
not the leisure. I wanted the stipend, but was not willing--scarcely
able--to pay so much for it. I was about to throw the engagement over
when a lucky thought struck me. I had a cast-off lecture entitled Money
and Morals. It had been rather popular. Why might I not put a head and
tail to this--a foreword and a few words in conclusion--and make it meet
the purpose and serve the occasion?

When the evening arrived there was a great audience. Half of the people
had come to applaud, the other half to antagonize. I was received,
however, with what seemed a united acclaim. When the cheering had
ceased, with the blandest air I began:

"In that chapter of the history of Ireland which was reserved for the
consideration of snakes, the historian, true to the solecism as well
as the brevity of Irish wit, informs us that 'there are no snakes in
Ireland.'

"I am afraid that on the present occasion I shall have to emulate this
flight of the Celtic imagination. I find myself billed to speak from a
Democratic standpoint as to which party offers the best practical means
for the benefit of the workingmen of the country. If I am to discharge
with fidelity the duty thus assigned me, I must begin by repudiating
the text in toto, because the Democratic Party recognizes no political
agency for one class which is not equally open to all classes. The
bulwark and belltower of its faith, the source and resource of its
strength are laid in the declaration, 'Freedom for all, special
privileges to none,' which applied to practical affairs would deny
to self-styled workingmen, organized into a cooeperative society,
any political means not enjoyed by every other organized cooeperative
society, and by each and every citizen, individually, to himself and his
heirs and assigns, forever.

"But in a country like ours, what right has any body of men to get
together and, labelling t