Project Gutenberg's The Grim Smile of the Five Towns, by Arnold Bennett

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Title: The Grim Smile of the Five Towns

Author: Arnold Bennett

Posting Date: September 11, 2009 [EBook #4734]
Release Date: December, 2003
First Posted: March 10, 2002

Language: English

Character set encoding: ASCII

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THE GRIM SMILE OF THE FIVE TOWNS

ARNOLD BENNETT

To my old and constant friend
JOSEPH DAWSON
a student profoundly versed
in the human nature of
the Five Towns

CONTENTS

The Lion's Share
Baby's Bath
The Silent Brothers
The Nineteenth Hat
Vera's First Christmas Adventure
The Murder of the Mandarin
Vera's Second Christmas Adventure
The Burglary
News of the Engagement
Beginning the New Year
From One Generation to Another
The Death of Simon Fuge
In a New Bottle

THE LION'S SHARE

I

In the Five Towns the following history is related by those who know it
as something side-splittingly funny--as one of the best jokes that ever
occurred in a district devoted to jokes. And I, too, have hitherto
regarded it as such. But upon my soul, now that I come to write it
down, it strikes me as being, after all, a pretty grim tragedy.
However, you shall judge, and laugh or cry as you please.

It began in the little house of Mrs Carpole, up at Bleakridge, on the
hill between Bursley and Hanbridge. Mrs Carpole was the second Mrs
Carpole, and her husband was dead. She had a stepson, Horace, and a son
of her own, Sidney. Horace is the hero, or the villain, of the history.
On the day when the unfortunate affair began he was nineteen years old,
and a model youth. Not only was he getting on in business, not only did
he give half his evenings to the study of the chemistry of pottery and
the other half to various secretaryships in connection with the
Wesleyan Methodist Chapel and Sunday-school, not only did he save
money, not only was he a comfort to his stepmother and a sort of uncle
to