irs; she only wished to spare her mother anxiety, by being
submissive to her care, in case these cares should be the last for her.
She did not dwell on the future, nor ask herself whether she looked for
life or death. Guy had bidden her not desire the last, and she believed
she did not form a wish; but there was repose to her in the belief that
she ought not to conceal from herself that there was more than ordinary
risk, and that it was right to complete all her affairs in this world,
and she was silent when her mother tried to interest her in prospects
that might cheer her; as if afraid to fasten on them, and finding more
peace in entire submission, than in feeding herself on hope that must be
coupled with fear.

Christmas-day was not allowed to pass without being a festival for
her, in her quiet room, where she lay, full of musings on his lonely
Christmas night last year, his verses folded among her precious books,
and the real joy of the season more within her grasp than in the turmoil
of last year. She was not afraid now to let herself fancy his voice in
the Angel's Song, and the rainbow was shining on her cloud.

CHAPTER 38

The coldness from my heart is gone,
But still the weight is there,
And thoughts which I abhor will come
To tempt me to despair.
--SOUTHEY

Amabel's one anxiety was for Philip. For a long time nothing was heard
of him at Hollywell, and she began to fear that he might have been less
fit to take care of himself than he had persuaded her to believe. When
at length tidings reached them, it was through the De Courcys. 'Poor
Morville,' wrote Maurice, 'had been carried ashore at Corfu, in the
stupor of a second attack of fever. He had been in extreme danger for
some time, and though now on the mend, was still unable to give any
account of himself.'

In effect, it was a relapse of the former disease, chiefly affecting
the brain, and his impatience to leave Recoara, and free himself from
Arnaud, had been a symptom of its approach, though it fortunately did
not absolutely overpower him till after he had embarked for Corfu, and
was in the way to be tended with the greatest solicitude. Long after the
fever was subdued, and his strength returning, his mind was astray, and
even when torturing delusions ceased, and he resumed the perception of
surrounding objects, memory and reflection wavered in dizzy confusion,
more distressing than either his bo