the
distance lighted windows were visible, reminding him of the festival,
and the exhausted master kept bowing ever lower, ever more courteously,
ever more cheerfully. My indulgent reader will easily understand that
in addition to a certain sense of fear which I experienced, the greatest
delight and even joyous emotion soon came upon me--for I saw that
eternal chaos was defeated and the triumphant hymn of bright harmony was
rising to the skies....

Not without a sense of pride I shall mention the modest offerings by
which my kind admirers were striving to express to me their feelings of
love and adoration. I am not afraid of calling out a smile on the lips
of my readers, for I feel how comical it is--I will say that among
the offerings brought me at first were fruit, cakes, all kinds of
sweet-meats. But I am afraid, however, that no one will believe me when
I say that I have actually declined these offerings, preferring the
observance of the prison regime in all its rigidness.

At the last lecture, a kind and honourable lady brought me a basketful
of live flowers. To my regret, I was compelled to decline this present,
too.

"Forgive me, madam, but flowers do not enter into the system of our
prison. I appreciate very much your magnanimous attention--I kiss your
hands, madam--" I said, "but I am compelled to decline the flowers.
Travelling along the thorny road to self-renunciation, I must not caress
my eyes with the ephemeral and illusionary beauty of these charming
lilies and roses. All flowers perish in our prison, madam."

Yesterday another lady brought me a very valuable crucifix of ivory, a
family heirloom, she said. Not afflicted with the sin of hypocrisy, I
told my generous lady frankly that I do not believe in miracles.

"But at the same time," I said, "I regard with the profoundest respect
Him who is justly called the Saviour of the world, and I honour greatly
His services to mankind.

"If I should tell you, madam, that the Gospel has long been my favourite
book, that there is not a day in my life that I do not open this great
Book, drawing from it strength and courage to be able to continue my
hard course--you will understand that your liberal gift could not have
fallen into better hands. Henceforth, thanks to you, the sad solitude of
my cell will vanish; I am not alone. I bless you, my daughter."

I cannot forego mentioning the strange thoughts brought out by the
crucifix as it hung there beside my por