would
have been forced to surrender, for about the middle of October the
disease among our horses increased and so serious was the epidemic
that none but salted horses survived. The enteric fever would also
have wrought havoc amongst us.

Another problem was whether all this would not have put an end to the
war; we still had generals left, and strong commandos, and it was, of
course, very likely that a great number of Boers driven to desperation
would have broken through, although two-thirds of our horses were not
fit for a bold dash. Perhaps fifteen hundred out of the two thousand
Boers would have made good their escape, but in any case large numbers
of wagons, guns, etc. would have fallen into the British hands and our
leaders might have been captured as well. The moral effect would have
caused many other burghers from the other commandos to have lost heart
and this at a moment, too, when they already required much
encouragement.

This was my view of the situation, and I think Lord Roberts, or
whoever was responsible, lost a splendid opportunity.

As regards my commando at the foot of the Mauch Mountains we turned
right about and I took temporary leave of Louis Botha. It was a very
affecting parting; Botha pressed my hand, saying, "Farewell, brother;
I hope we shall get through all right. God bless you. Let me hear from
you soon and frequently."

That night we encamped at Boschbokrand, where we found a store
unoccupied, and a house probably belonging to English refugees, for
shop and dwelling had been burgled and looted. After our big laager
had been arranged, Boer fashion, and the camp fire threw its lurid
light against the weird dark outline of the woods, the Boers grouped
themselves over the veldt. Some who had walked twenty miles that day
fell down exhausted.

I made the round of the laager, and I am bound to say that in spite of
the trying circumstances, my burghers were in fairly cheerful spirits.

I discussed the immediate prospects with the officers, and arranged
for a different commando to be placed in the advance guard each day
and a different field-cornet in the rear. Boers conversant with the
locality were detailed to ride ahead and to scout and reconnoitre for
water.

When I returned that night to my waggon the evening meal was ready,
but for the first time in my life I could eat nothing. I felt too
dejected. My cook, Jan Smith, and my messmates were curious to know
the reason I did not "wade i