adys Doolittle Batt.

I longed to see these lakes under the glamour of their newly added
beauty.

Imagine, therefore, my surprise and happiness when I received the
following communication from my revered and beloved chief, Professor
Farrago, dated from the Smithsonian Institute, Washington, whither he
had been summoned in haste to examine and pronounce upon the identity
of a very small bird supposed to be a specimen of that rare and almost
extinct creature, the two-toed titmouse, _Mustitta duototus_, to be
scientifically exact, as I invariably strive to be.

The important letter in question was as follows:

To
Percy Smith, B.S., D.F., etc., etc.,
Curator, Department of Anthropology,
Administration Building,
Bronx Park, N.Y.

_My Dear Mr. Smith_:

Several very important and determined ladies, recently honoured by
the Government in having a number of lakes in Alaska named after them,
have decided to make a pilgrimage to that region, inspired by a
characteristic desire to gaze upon the lakes named after them
individually.

They request information upon the following points:

1st. Are the waters of the lakes in that locality sufficiently clear
for a lady to do her hair by? In that event, the expedition will not
burden itself with looking-glasses.

2nd. Are there any hotels? (You need merely say, no. I have tried to
explain to them that it is, for the most part, an unexplored
wilderness, but they insist upon further information from you.)

3rd. If there are hotels, is there also running water to be had? (You
may tell them that there is plenty of running water.)

4th. What are the summer outdoor amusements? (You may inform them that
there is plenty of bathing, boating, fishing, and an abundance of shade
trees. Also, excellent mountain-climbing to be had in the vicinity. You
need not mention the pastimes of "Hunt the Flea" or "Dodge the
Skeeter.")

I am not by nature cruel, Mr. Smith, but when these ladies informed
me that they had decided to penetrate that howling and unexplored
wilderness without being burdened or interfered with by any member of
my sex, for one horrid and criminal moment I hoped they would. Because
in that event none of them would ever come back.

However, in my heart milder and more humane sentiments prevailed. I
pointed out to them the peril of their undertaking, the dangers of an
unexplored region, the necessity of mascu