in this and that action
of his life; the defences and exculpations he puts forward for this and
that part of his indefensible conduct; the debate he holds now with the
presbyterian party and now with the prelatist; the very way he puts his
finger down on the weak and unsound places in both of the opposing
parties; and, not least, his power of aphoristic thought and expression
in the running diary of his spiritual life, all combine to leave the
conviction on his reader's mind that Lord Brodie was one of the very
ablest men of a very able day in Scotland. I open his voluminous diary
at random, and I at once come on such passages as these: 'If substantial
duties are neglected or slighted it is a shrewd suspicion, be the
repentance what it will, that all is not right. Lord, discover Thyself
in the duties of the time, and in every substantial duty. At the same
time, hang not the weight of our wellbeing on our duties, but on Christ
by faith. I am a reeling, unstable, staggering, unsettled, lukewarm
creature. For Thy compassion's sake forgive and heal, warm, establish,
enlighten, draw me and I will follow. I am full of self-love, darkness
in my judgment, fear to confess Thee, or hazard myself, or my estate, or
my peace. . . . We poor creatures are commanded by our affections and
our passions; they are not at our command; but the Holy One doth exercise
all His attributes at His own will; they are all at His command; they are
not passions or perturbations in His mind, though they transport us. When
I would hate, I cannot. When I would love, I cannot. When I would
grieve, I cannot. When I would desire, I cannot. But it is the better
for us that all is as He wills. . . . Another of the deep deceits of my
heart is this, that I have more affection in prayer than I have
corresponding holiness in my walk or conversation. I wondered not to see
the men of the world so taken up with covetous, ambitious, vain projects,
for no man's head and heart can be so full of them as my head and heart
are. Oh keep me from these unsober, distempered, mad, unruly thoughts!
When I am away from Thee then I am quite out of my wit. But God can make
use of poison to expel poison. Oh, if I were examined and brought to the
light, what a monstrous creature I would be seen to be! For as I see
myself I am no better than a devil, void of sincerity and of uprightness
in what I do myself, and yet judge others, condemning in another man what
I excus