agination converted poor pug into a
blood-thirsty Spanish grenadier, with a tremendous cap on his head. Full of
this dreadful idea, he instantly fired his piece, roaring out that the
enemy had scaled the walls. The guards took the alarm; the drums were beat;
signal-guns fired; and in less than ten minutes, the governor and his whole
garrison were under arms. The supposed grenadier, being very much
incommoded by his cap, and almost blinded by the pease, was soon overtaken
and seized; and by this capture, the tranquillity of the garrison was soon
restored, without that slaughter and bloodshed which every man had
prognosticated at the beginning of this dire alarm.

MISCELLANEOUS.

Dunning.--The witty Lord Ross, having spent all his money in London, set
out for Ireland, in order to recruit his purse. On his way, he happened to
meet with Sir Murrough O'Brien, driving for the capital in a handsome
phaeton, with six prime dun-coloured horses. "Sir Murrough," exclaimed his
lordship, "what a contrast there is betwixt you and me! You are driving
your _duns_ before you, but my _duns_ are driving me before them."

Steele & Addison.--A gentleman who was dining with another, praised the
meat very much, and asked who was the butcher? "His name is
Addison."--"Addison!" echoed the guest, "pray is he any relation to the
essayist?"--"In all probability he is, for he is seldom without his steel
(_Steele_) by his side."

A Tedious Preacher.--Mr. Canning was once asked by an English clergyman how
he liked the sermon he had preached before him. "Why, it was a short
sermon," quoth Canning. "Oh yes," said the preacher; "you know I avoid
being tedious." "Ah, but," replied Canning, "you _were_ tedious."

Charity sermon.--Sydney Smith, preaching a charity sermon, frequently
repeated the assertion that, of all nations, Englishmen were most
distinguished for generosity and the love of their species. The collection
happened to be inferior to his expectations, and he said that he had
evidently made a great mistake, for that his expression should have been,
that they were distinguished for the love of their _specie_.

Pope the Poet.--This celebrated poet is said to have been once severely
retorted upon. A question arose in company respecting the reading of a
passage with or without a note of interrogation. Pope rather arrogantly
asked one gentleman if he knew what a note of interrogation was. "Yes, sir:
it is _a little crooked thin