_William Crook_, at the sign of the three Bibles
on _Fleet Bridge_, 1665.

* * * * *

CHARACTER.

_Of one that_ Zanys _the good Companion_.

He is a wit of an under Region, grosly imitating on the lower rope,
what t'other does neatly on the higher; and is only for the laughter
of the vulgar; whilst your wiser and better sort can scarcely smile at
him: He talks nothing but kennel-raked fluff, and his discourse is
rather like fruit cane up rotten from the ground, than freshly
gathered from the Tree. He is so far from a courtly wit, as his
breeding seems only to have been i' th' Suburbs; or at best, he seems
only graduated good company in a Tavern (the Bedlam of wits) where men
are mad rather than merry; here one breaking a jest on the Drawer, or
a Candlestick; there another repeating the old end of a Play, or some
bawdy song; this speaking bilk, that nonsense, whilst all with loud
houting and laughter confound the _Fidlers_ noise, who may well be
call'd a noise indeed, for no _Musick_ can be heard for them; so
whilst he utters nothing but old stories, long since laught thridbare,
or some stale jest broken twenty times before: His _mirth_ compared
with theirs, new and at first hand, is just like _Brokers_ ware in
comparison with _Mercers_, or _Long-lane_ compar'd unto _Cheap-side_:
his wit being rather the _Hogs-heads_ than his own, favouring more of
_Heidelberg_ than of _Hellicon_, and he rather a drunken than a good
companion.

* * * * *

CHARACTER.

_Of a bold abusive Wit._

He talks madly, _dash, dash,_ without any fear at all, and never cares
how he _bespatters_ others, or defiles himself; nor ceases he till he
has quite run himself out of breath; when no wonder, if to fools he
seems to get the start of those who wisely pick out their way, and are
as fearful of abusing others as themselves: He has the _Buffoons_
priviledge, of saying or doing anything without exceptions, and he
will call a jealous man _Cuckold_, a childe of doubtful birth
_Bastard_, and a _Lady_ of suspected honor a _Whore_, and they but
laugh at it; and all _Scholars_ are _Pedants_; and _Physicians_,
_Quacks_ with him, when to be angry at it is the avowing it. Then in
_Ladies_ chambers, he will tumble beds, and towse your _Ladies_ dress
up unto the height, to the hazard of a _Bed-staff_ thrown at his head,
or rap o're the fingers with a _Busk_, and that is all; o